‘Queer’ was reclaimed as an umbrella term for people identifying as not-heterosexual and/or not-cisgender in the early 1980s, but being queer is more than just being non-straight/non-cis; it’s a political and ideological statement, a label asserting an identity distinct from gay and/or traditional gender identities.
People identifying as queer are typically not cis gays or cis lesbians, but bi, pan, ace, trans, nonbinary, intersex, etc.: we’re the silent/ced letters. We’re the marginalised majority within the LGBTQIA+ community, and
‘queer’ is our rallying cry.
And that’s equally pissing off and terrifying terfs and cis LGs.
There’s absolutely no historical or sociolinguistic reason why ‘queer’ should be a worse slur than ‘gay.’ Remember how we had all those campaigns to make people stop using ‘gay’ as a synonym for ‘bad’?
Yet nobody is suggesting we should abolish ‘gay’ as a label. We accept that even though ‘gay’ sometimes is and historically frequently was used in a derogatory manner, mlm individuals have the right to use that word. We have ad campaigns, twitter hashtags, and viral Facebook posts defending ‘gay’ as an identity label and asking people to stop using it as a slur.
Whereas ‘queer’ is treated exactly opposite: a small but vocal group of people within feminist and LGBTQIA+ circles insists that it’s a slur and demands that others to stop using it as a personal, self-chosen identity label.
Why?
Because “queer is a slur” was invented by terfs specifically to exclude trans, nonbinary, and
intersex people from feminist and non-heterosexual discourse, and was
subsequently adopted by cis gays and cis lesbians to exclude bi/pan and ace
people.
It’s classic divide-and-conquer tactics: when our umbrella term is redefined as a slur and we’re harassed into silence for using it, we no longer have a word for what we are allowing us to organise for social/political/economic support; we are denied the opportunity to influence or shape the spaces we inhabit; we can’t challenge existing community power structures; we’re erased from our own history.
Pro tip: when you alter historical evidence to deny a marginalised group empowerment, you’re one of the bad guys.
“Queer is a slur” is used by terfs and cis gays/lesbians to silence the voices of trans/nonbinary/intersex/bi/pan/ace people in society and even within our own communities, to isolate us and shame us for existing.
“Queer is a slur” is saying “I am offended by people who do not conform to traditional gender or sexual identities because they are not sexually available to me or validate my personal identity.”
“Queer is a slur” is defending heteronormativity.
“Queer is a slur” is frankly embarrassing. It’s an admission of ignorance and prejudice. It’s an insidious discriminatory discourse parroted uncritically in support of a divisive us-vs-them mentality targeting the most vulnerable members of the LGBTQIA+ community for lack of courage to confront the white cis straight men who pose an actual danger to us as individuals and as a community.
Tl;dr:
I’m here, I’m queer, and I’m too old for this shit.
I initially reblogged this without commentary, which implies endorsement, but on further reflection, I have to point out that “queer” is still used as a slur. Yes, it was reclaimed and now has an important political and ideological legacy. Yes, it is powerful in a positive way for many people. Erasing that part of the word’s history is unacceptable and anyone taking the stance that “queer” has never been anything but an insult at the very least need to learn some history. But stating unequivocally that queer is not a slur is just … untrue. Implying that LGBTQA+ people who have had “queer” used as a pejorative against them and therefore don’t feel comfortable with “queer” are defending heterosexuality is frankly offensive to them.
Also, this is the first I’m hearing about terfs “redefining” the term “queer” as a slur, I’m not really sure what’s going on there.
(yes, I’m queer and have been for like a decade. I like the term, personally. Of course, no one ever called me that in order to wound me, so it has no negative connotations for me.)
But stating unequivocally that queer is not a slur is just … untrue.
Implying that LGBTQA+ people who have had “queer” used as a pejorative
against them and therefore don’t feel comfortable with “queer” are
defending heterosexuality is frankly offensive to them.
1.
I’m not saying ‘queer’ has never been used in a derogatory way; of course it has. Every word can be an insult if it’s used as one, and this goes double for reclaimed terminology. ‘Gay’ and ‘queer’ are two such words, but we could also mention words like ‘fat’ and how it is being reclaimed by the fat acceptance movement, or the N-word being used by PoC. Both ‘fat’ and the N-word are loaded with meanings: historical, emotional, social, and political. Everyone understands that calling someone fat or the N-word as insults is hurtful and unacceptable behaviour, just like calling someone gay or queer as insults is also hurtful and unacceptable.
However, “queer is a slur” is not a statement of fact pointing out the obvious notion that ‘queer’ can be and sometimes is used to insult people. “Queer is a slur” is a trans-exclusionary catchphrase coined to shame queer people into silence. The original post above is a textbook example: a person who does not identify as queer messages a complete stranger (me) who does identify as queer for the sole reason of telling her 1) your chosen label is offensive (= your existence is offensive to me), 2) “grow up” = change your label.
If queer had been a triggering word to the sender of the message, they
could have taken any number of steps to protect themselves from seeing triggering content on their dash: asking me to tag posts containing the word, using one of the tumblr blacklist tools I linked in my second post, or simply blocking me. But they didn’t; they told me to stop self-identifying as queer, to censor the language I use about myself and my community. That is an act of aggression.
2.
Implying that {not feeling] comfortable with “queer” [is]
defending heterosexuality
Not heterosexuality. Heteronormativity. ‘Queer’ is a self-identifier used primarily by people who reject the binary gender paradigm, traditional gender roles, genital myopia, and the understanding of sexuality which uses heterosexuality as the golden standard from which all other sexualities deviate.
There’s sadly a lot of heteronormativity in gay and lesbian groupings, especially where lesbians and terfs overlap, and it’s marginalising trans, nonbinary, genderqueer, intersex, and similar people in the LGBTQIA+ community in particular. The people saying “queer is a slur” are usually the same people saying trans women aren’t women and don’t belong in female (especially lesbian) spaces, that trans women and passing trans men have male privilege, that ace people are heterosexual, etc.
This all comes back to terfs and their branding of ‘queer’ as a slur to target trans people and prevent them from organising with other members of the community, and gays and lesbians co-opting it to marginalise and gatekeep bi/pan and ace people. There’s a movement among terfs and LGs, especially online, to prevent this:
So yes, ‘queer’ can be used as a slur. But “queer is a slur” is a very specific phrase meaning “if you’re not gay or lesbian, you don’t deserve a voice in your own community.” Be on high alert when you observe someone saying “queer a slur” to an actual queer-identified person. It’s a censorship technique.
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