This is a painting of Jacek Malczewski called simply ‘Death’ and it’s my favourite personification of death in any medium.
She’s not creepy or scary, or sexy, or abstract. She is this thick woman with worn hands, dressed as normal, with a non-stylised scythe and pins in her hair: like a farmer’s wife that just came form the field and rests against the wall, catching some sun. She is not creeping about the dying one holding her scythe over their head, she is just there, calmly waiting her turn.
This painting always fills me with peace and optimism when I think about death. She is just there, outside the window, in no hurry at all, sensible and down to earth. I can live with that.
Jacek Malczewski (15 July 1854 – 8 October 1929) is one of the most revered painters of Poland, associated with the patriotic Young Poland movement following the century of Partitions. He is regarded as the father of Polish Symbolism. In his creative output, Malczewski combined the predominant style of his times, with historical motifs of Polish martyrdom, the Romantic ideals of independence, Christian and Greek traditions, folk mythology, as well as his love of the natural environment.
I think that’s an axe? But IIRC, that’s an alternative tool for Death in Eastern Europe, along with a sword.
I love Tom Hanks. I’ve always loved Tom Hanks. I loved Before Tom Hanks. And I love After Tom Hanks. Now, some of you are probably saying, “Froggie, there is only one Tom Hanks.”
Ah, so young.
You see, when I was a youth Tom Hanks was seen very differently. He was that cross-dressing guy. Eventually he did Splash and The Money Pit and he was that Generic Comedy Movie Guy. You liked him, but unless his movies were on cable you kinda forgot about him. Then he did Big and everybody flinched for a moment. It was a special movie and there were signs there was more to Tom Hanks than meets the eye. But then he did Turner & Hooch and everybody went back to seeing Tom as that Generic Comedy Movie Guy.
He was like cotton candy. Sweet, enjoyable, but not a lot of substance. Empty calories from an occasional treat.
Then there was Joe vs the Volcano. I actually went to see this in the theater.
It was… somethin’.
Some people were ready to put Tom out to pasture. His relevance as a comedy star was fading. His leading man abilities came into question. Tom was always very humble so he was like, “No big deal. I’ll be a character actor. I’ll just do supporting roles.”
So he did A League of Their Own. He said, “There’s no crying in baseball!” and stole the movie. People changed their damn minds again. “He should be the star of a movie!” And I was like, “He was! …a bunch of times!”
In comes Sleepless in Seattle. For better or worse, he helped birth a new age of Romantic Comedies. Mothers everywhere thought he was adorable. He was a bonafide star again and could call his own shots. But I’m not sure Tom really wanted to be Romantic Comedy Guy after being Generic Comedy Movie Guy.
So he went a different direction. Thus began… After Tom Hanks.
Tom’s next film was not a comedy. Not even a little bit. He played a gay man. Who had AIDs. And was dying. While fighting off homophobes with The Law. And his costar was dramatic heavyweight Denzel Washington. Tom was so committed that he lost a ton of weight to look sick. It was a heartbreaking movie with a beautiful performance.
Before Philidelphia was released people were a bit confused. They were like, “Huh? Tom Hanks? He’s that cross dressing, mermaid loving, comedy guy who did a buddy cop movie with a dog named Hooch. What’s going on here?”
And then the movie came out and pretty much everyone who saw it was like, “Holy shit. Where did that come from?”
It turns out Tom Hanks could act. I mean, he could act. For the longest time people saw his goofy face and curly hair and didn’t really test his range. He didn’t belong in a movie fighting a volcano. People had been selling him short for years. But he never complained. He was always just happy to be working. He just waited patiently and when he saw a shot, he took it.
Tom went off to the races. Forest Gump confirmed it. It wasn’t luck. Tom could definitely act like the dickens. Then came Apollo 13. Houston we have an actor.
He did Toy Story and was like, “How about I kick start a revolutionary new form or movie-making?” DONE.
Then he was like, “I want to be an action hero, but with feeeelings.” Saving Private Ryan. DONE.
Then he was like, “Those romantic comedy moms were so nice to me and kinda saved my career.” You’ve Got Mail. THANKS MOMS. DONE.
Then Tom got a little crazy. “What if it really hurt when I have to pee?” The Green Mile. DONE.
“I want to act, but I am sick of other people.” Cast Away. DONE.
“I should throw that Leo DiCaprio kid a bone.” Catch Me If You Can. DONE.
[Leo powers up.]
“Accents are fun.” The Terminal. DONE.
“Okay, what if I test out this motion capture technology that isn’t quite ready and demonstrate the greatest example of what the Uncanny Valley is?” The Polar Express. CREEPILY DONE.
“I want… MONEY. Make it rain!” The Da Vinci Code. DONE. FRANCHISE INITIATED.
“Let’s get weird.” Cloud Atlas. CONFUSINGLY DONE.
“Maybe I should go back to just acting good and stuff.” Captain Phillips. DONE.
“I enjoyed being a captain and acting good.” Sully. DONE.
At this point, Tom had DONE it all. But I think a new challenge lies ahead.
Hollywood had a dilemma. Mr. Rogers was the purest being to ever grace this planet. Who is the least scummy person in the industry?
Tom Fucking Hanks.
Ack, sorry Mr. Rogers. That was uncalled for.
Tom Hecking Hanks.
And that brings us to today. Tom Hanks is going to be Mr. Rogers and I really hope it’s amazing because Fred deserves nothing less. And I think he wold approve of Tom telling his story.
I’m not sure I’ve seen another story quite like Tom Hanks. He was so close to becoming a forgotten Generic Comedy Actor Guy. He could have easily become one of those people discussed on “I Love the 80s” where the talking heads are like, “Whatever happened to that guy?”
I’m very glad that didn’t happen. Tom seems like a genuinely good guy. I don’t think I’ve ever heard a story where someone was like, “That Tom Hanks is a real douche.” He still seems to be madly in love with his wife. They’ve been together for 30 years! I wonder if that is some kind of Hollywood record. He’s a good father. A good friend. A great spokesman for WWII vets. And he is always willing to make a fan’s wedding memorable.
He just inspires me to keep trying to be a better me. He inspires me to be a sustainable better me.
And for that I’d like to say…
This was a great TED Talk. Thanks.
For those of you too young to have seen most of his early movies, just…. imagine if Will Ferrell had done Elf and Anchorman and Stepbrothers…. and then in 2009 won Sean Penn’s Oscar for Milk.
A lot of the time when people give advice intended to relieve anxiety, they suggest doing “relaxing” things like drawing, painting, knitting, taking a bubble bath, coloring in one of those zen coloring books, or watching glitter settle to the bottom of a jar.
This advice is always well-intentioned, and I’m not here to diss people who either give it or who benefit from it. But it has never, ever done shit for me, and this is because it goes about resolving anxiety in the completely wrong way.
THE WORST THING YOU CAN DO when suffering from anxiety is to do a “relaxing” thing that just enables your mind to dwell and obsess more on the thing that’s bothering you. You need to ESCAPE from the dwelling and the obsession in order to experience relief.
You can drive to a quiet farm, drive to the beach, drive to a park, or anywhere else, but as someone who has tried it all many, many times, trust me–it’s a waste of gas. You will just end up still sad and stressed, only with sand on your butt. You can’t physically escape your sadness. Your sadness is inside of you. To escape, you need to give your brain something to play with for a while until you can approach the issue with a healthier frame of mind.
People who have anxiety do not need more time to contemplate, because we will use it to contemplate how much we suck.
In fact, you could say that’s what anxiety is–hyper-contemplating. When we let our minds run free, they run straight into the thorn bushes. Our minds are already running, and they need to be controlled. They need to be given something to do, or they’ll destroy everything, just like an overactive husky dog ripping up all the furniture.
Therefore, I present to you:
THINGS YOU SHOULD NOT DO WHEN ANXIOUS
–Go on a walk
–Watch a sunset, watch fish in an aquarium, watch glitter, etc.
–Go anywhere where the main activity is sitting and watching
–Draw, color, do anything that occupies the hands and not the mind
–Do yoga, jog, go fishing, or anything that lets you mentally drift
–Do literally ANYTHING that gives you great amounts of mental space to obsess and dwell on things.
THINGS YOU SHOULD DO WHEN ANXIOUS:
–Do a crossword puzzle, Sudoku, or any other mind teaser game. Crosswords are the best.
–Write something. It doesn’t have to be a masterpiece. Write the Top 10 Best Restaurants in My City. Rank celebrities according to Best Smile. Write some dumb Legolas fanfiction and rip it up when you’re done. It’s not for publication, it’s a relief exercise that only you will see.
–Read something, watch TV, or watch a movie–as long as it’s engrossing. Don’t watch anything which you can run as background noise (like, off the top of my head, Say Yes to The Dress.) As weird as it seems, American Horror Story actually helps me a lot, because it sucks me in.
–Masturbate. Yes, I’m serious. Your mind has to concentrate on the mini-movie it’s running. It can’t run Sexy Titillating Things and All The Things That are Bothering Me at the same time. (…I hope. If it can, then…ignore this one.)
–Do math problems—literally, google “algebra problems worksheet” and solve them. If you haven’t done math since 7th grade this will really help you. I don’t mean with math, I mean with the anxiety.
–Play a game or a sport with someone that requires great mental concentration. Working with 5 people to get a ball over a net is a challenge which will require your brain to turn off the Sadness Channel.
–Play a video game, as long as it’s not something like candy crush or Tetris that’s mindless.
THINGS YOU SHOULD DO DURING PANIC ATTACKS ESPECIALLY:
–List the capitals of all the U.S. states
–List the capitals of all the European countries
–List all the shapes you can see. Or all the colors.
–List all the blonde celebrities you can think of.
–Pull up a random block of text and count all the As in it, or Es or whatever.
Now obviously, I am not a doctor. I am just an anxious person who has tried almost everything to help myself. I’ve finally realized that the stuff people recommend never works because this is a disorder that thrives on free time and free mental space. When I do the stuff I listed above, I can breathe again. And I hope it helps someone here too.
(Now this shouldn’t have to be said but if the “do nots” work for you then by all means do them. They’ve just never worked for me.)
This would’ve been great an hour ago
If your anxiety includes rapid heartbeat for no reason then it may help to exercise! It helps for me because I’m focused on whatever moves I’m doing and breathing, and it gives my heart rate a reason to be that high so that I can start the slow cooking down process and (hopefully) bring that heart rate down with it. Look up a quick cardio workout on YouTube or something and just do it in your room!
This is so, SO true.
All ‘doing something relaxing’ ever did for me was give my brain MORE free time to FREAK THE FUCK OUT.
Drawing and making stuff does occupy my mind so I mean YMMV
Maintaining religion in a post-apocalyptic setting – Jewish & Hindu Emphasis
A lot of the signs of Jewish devoutness are things you can totally do in a postapocalyptic setting. I mean first of all, you can break any rule to save a human life, so if you’re not supposed to kindle a flame on Shabbat but you have to light a fire to not die, then you’re fine.
But anyway. Shabbat is about rest and renewal, so your character can take one day in every seven, starting at sundown (Friday night if they have a way of knowing what the days of the week were in the Before Times!) to rest, say the special prayers – if they’re devout enough to be “devout” as you said in your question, they’ll know a lot of this stuff by heart – and refrain from the kind of work you do on weekdays. Like maybe if they’re a posthole-digger they don’t dig any post-holes on “Saturday” morning.
Not eating pork, shellfish, rabbit, the back end of beef, and bugs is another thing – but again, people did wind up eating all kinds of whatnot in the Warsaw Ghetto – these rules aren’t meant to be dying over. If they know when Passover is in this world they can leave off eating bread for a week and maybe even cobble together a makeshift seder from memory.
If you have a married woman and she’s Orthodox she can still cover her hair. If she’s not Orthodox this is probably not an issue.
If they have any way of knowing when Yom Kippur and Tisha b’Av are, and it’s safe to do so, they can fast.
Especially if they’re Orthodox, they can start the day with the morning prayers. If this person is Orthodox and menstruating, and there’s water in which to do so, they can say the mikveh prayer while taking the bath after their period is all finished. (I’m Reform but I find comfort in this kind of thing, too.)
If we’re talking about someone who wasn’t raised in the normal world – I was assuming the apocalypse in this was recent, but I mean if they’ve never known normal-Earth – then they might have learned all these things by rote from parents or community instead of from going to temple.
This, plus living up to Jewish values like tikkun olam (healing the world) and tzedekah (justice) and all that – that’s all it takes to feel like good/satisfying rep to me.
–Shira
As I’ve probably mentioned before, the term “Hinduism” is kind of a misnomer, as it implies that there’s one such thing. If Christianity or Islam are families of sibling belief systems that share obvious commonalities, “Hinduism” is a huge family of distant cousins, groups of which often don’t seem to have much of anything in common and you just have to take their word that they’re related. If you look hard, there might be a family resemblance.
I often think about this when confronted with the question of how I’d live my life in a post-apocalyptic wasteland (and this is something I consider with alarming regularity these days). Which are the parts of my upbringing that are actually important? What of it have I already jettisoned by choice or changes in circumstance and what more would I? And what of it is silly garbage that’s going to get me killed by the next band of water bandidos marauding the blasted hellscape that is New New York City?
Anything that you might broadly categorize as a religion has aspects that range from the ritualistic to the philosophical so of course Hinduism is no exception. I’d posit that extreme ritualism and extreme navel-gazing are both things likely to get you shanked by bandidos so in the interests of survival your character is probably going to want to tread a middle path. Any rules against eating beef are probably out the window (unless it just makes them sick regardless). So is strict adherence to doing a morning prayer or yoga, or meditating so deeply you don’t notice the bandidos coming. On the other hand, there may be good reasons for maintaining dietary restrictions (e.g., you can’t trust that any food grown outside the Safe Zone isn’t deadly). Meditation can relieve stress and you could probably use some stress relief after the apocalypse. However, arguably these markers are matters of culture rather than belief (that is, not all Hindus eschew beef or practice meditation; those that do do because they were exposed to the concept somewhere).
This is a hard question to answer because it would really depend what kind of Hindu background this character comes from and how (if relevant) they related to their culture “before the fall” so to speak. They may identify with one particular deity due to their circumstances (for example, Vishnu, to preserve the world they do have; Shiva or Durga, as a reflection of the destruction that presumably brought about said apocalypse, and from which there will hopefully come renewal; or Ganesh, to remove the obstacles they surely encounter every day). I should note that were it me in that position, any identification with or invocation to a god would probably be extremelysarcastic: the gods didn’t prevent the apocalypse, why the hell would they help me now? Again, it depends on the character’s personal outlook.
You might also consider some of the relations elemental factors have to most Hindu rituals and how that might change in this environment. For example: water, light, fire, and food are all typically revered or at least valued greatly.
– Water is a life-giving resource and many Hindus revere rivers. In a wasteland, protecting clean and safe water might very well have sacred significance as a matter of literal life and death.
– The divine is often thought to dwell in food and sustenance and gods receive offerings of food at festivals. You may not be having very many festivals but the value of food may be thrown into stark new focus.
– Does this world lack for sunlight, warmth, or energy? Orthoprax Hindu priesthood often revolves around keeping a sacred fire. In a world where flame is the power source of a community, for example, the person who keeps the fire going could very well think of it as a sacred ritual, and maybe that’s a connection to the beliefs or practices they or their family held before. You can even abstract it a bit more. What if a postapocalyptic community runs off some relict solar panels? Some character might see that as very literally depending on the sun for their survival.
If there is one thing that unites most flavors of Hinduism, it’s the notion of dharma, which is hard to translate, but loosely means “order” or “duty,” or more generally “that which is established or held firm.” So, what about this character holds firm? I’d say in such an extreme circumstance, devotion or religious practice is more than just throwing out the names of some gods every now and then to remind people of your roots (especially if you keep praying for help and it never comes). It’s more about how you conduct yourself in relation to the world, and when you reach back into those old virtues ingrained in you by your family, how you exercise them relative to nature and the people around you when literally may not be sure that the sun will rise tomorrow. It’s not easy but the apocalypse rarely is.
OH and I get to work with my very least favorite co worker today.
Lovely.
I need to go make more tea.
The driver coming in to pick up the recycling, who knows that we monitor the weather radar 24/7; “Are we going to get any more storms today?”
Me, who sits right next to a monitor dedicated to weather radar, since we watch for lightning strikes in the area, and call work suspensions if any lightning gets close. “There’s a few patchy storms around yet but the bad stuff is all past us.”
Driver; “Oh good. Have a good day.”
Me; “You too.”
My dickhead co-worker, as soon as the driver walks out; “I didn’t know we were the fucking weather service.”
Me; “…he knows we monitor the radar all day and that I don’t mind him asking, and he was talking to me, not you, and again he knows I don’t mind, so chill.”
Him; “Muttering”
The weird thing is that this dude USED to be an okay guy with a good sense of humor.
But about a year ago, he started the keto diet, and he has lost a lot of weight…but he’s been a complete asshole since he started the diet. Just, will snipe at anything and everything anyone says.
Eat some bread and be happy, dude.
Oh, so his body is perpetually poisonning itself in a desesperate attempt to produce enough sugars for his brain. That’ll make me cranky too tbf.
I had no idea, but another comment here made me look it up and apparently major changes in mood are a Thing on keto. Like, a LOT of people become assholes when they go on a keto diet.
I’m no expert on the long-term effects of keto diets but…like…that can’t be a good sign.
Eat some bread. If anyone makes fun of you for being chubby, fuck ‘em.
I cannot second this hard enough. For everyone following me who may not know that: the human brain cannot use any other form of energy that glucose and ketone bodies. If it doesn’t have any available your liver will make them, producing toxic by-products and working less efficiently to purge the usual riff-raff made on a daily basis by your metabolism. Eat carbs. Fuck this fatphobic society.