I WANT TO KNOW THE STORY BEHIND THIS. I HONESTLY THOUGHT THEY WERE LOVERS.
Okay, okay, so short version:
Joker seduced Harley while he was in Arkham and she was his psychologist. He did so by manipulating sessions to make him seem pitiable.
Harley broke Joker out. Joker was originally going to kill her then, but fans had latched onto Harley Quinn’s new look and she was a fan favorite (mind you as I recall, she was originally introduced in BTAS, and then transferred to the comics later). So she ended up surviving his first murder attempt.
He decided that although annoying she could still be useful (since she’s actually brilliant, and at this point somewhat codependent). This leads to a string of horrific abuses and murder attempts. Including (in the TV show alone) throwing her through a window that is at *least* three stories up, choking her, beating her with a hammer, threatening her with one of his gag guns (which, depending on the gun, may or may not kill her in various ways), and attempting to get hyenas to eat her.
In the comics, it includes starving her, chaining her to a wall in a sewer on top of corpses of “failed Harleys,” poisoning her, leaving her in burning buildings, pushing her into the line of police fire, gaslighting her basically every time he fails to kill her, and the list goes on. When she becomes pregnant with her and Joker’s kid, she leaves for nine months, to her sister’s place, and gives birth there. She doesn’t tell Joker about the kid (and goes out of her way to prevent Joker from finding out). She tells Canary that it’s because Mr. J would be too busy for a kid, but if you pay attention to Harley’s behavior throughout the comic, the clear subtext is “My kid would end up dead or worse if Joker knew about her.”
Additionally, post break up, she notes he was abusive, says it wasn’t love, it was manipulation, and frequently describes it as the worst part of her life.
I’m no expert but I remember one more thing… she said he never noticed she was gone for those 9 months.
THANK YOU FOR CLEARING THIS UP.
This is why couples are creepy as fuck for dressing up as Harley and the joker and why people are especially fucked up for thinking the relationship they had in suicide squad was “goals”
Stop abusing your boyfriends and yes what you are doing is abuse.
Stop:
Yelling at him in front of his friends
Hitting or slapping him when he does or says something you don’t like
Telling him he doesn’t have a choice when it comes to decisions that involve both of you
Telling him he can’t hang out with friends because you don’t like him
Telling him to not talk to other girls even if they are his friend
Forcing him to spend every moment with you
Belittling him and pointing out all his flaws
Calling him stupid or making fun of him for making a mistake
Threatening to break up with him if he doesn’t do what you want
Being emotionally manipulative and crying until he does what you want
Accusing him of cheating every time he’s not with you
Blow up is phone if he doesn’t text you every five minutes
Telling him you are the must thing that has ever happened to him and no one else will love
Physically attacking him when ever you are mad
Forcing him to have sex despite that fact that he said he didn’t want to
Invading his privacy by going through his phone
Getting mad at him for changing his password and demanding he tell you what it is
If a guy did any of these things to a girl it would be considered abuse but since its the other way around its considered normal. Throughout High school I saw many girl treating their boyfriends like shit. Sometime even physically abusing them in the hallways and no one trying to stop it because its a girl attacking a boy.
Boys: If your girlfriend does anything on this list leave her. It is abuse and you deserve better.
Girls: if you find your self doing anything on this list to your boyfriend you need to knock it off because you are being abusive.
!!!!!!!!
My brother was abused by his babies mom and it started like this and escalated to child abuse and neglect.
You don’t deserve to be screamed at, ignored, or assaulted.
Not showing affection when she wants or not hugging her before class) or missing a phone call doesn’t warrant getting cussed out or hit.
Lol, I lost 5 followers from reblogging this. That’s fine, y’all can go
Whole lot of grown women do this too.
Just wanna throw these in too
Being passive aggressive with him when he wants to spend time with friends or doing other things
controlling when he’s able to go out with friends
Breaking up his friendships with other girls just because you’re insecure
Making him feel like his opinions in decisions that affect the both of you are irrelevant and don’t matter
testing him in anyway in general without his knowledge or permission (example: catfishing! it’s manipulative and weird don’t fucking do that)
taking money/credit cards without permission to spend on things without his knowledge ( had an ex friend do this constantly to her boyfriend and she’d always condone it because “he’ll get over it” )
guilting him for hanging out with friends/family over you and making him choose between you and friends/family
telling him “you don’t love me if you *insert harmless activity he wants to do here* “
being rude or mean to him in front of others to assert dominance or power over him
downloading apps to spy on his phone activity (yes, this is a thing “”regular”” people do) or snooping on his social media to see who he’s talking to
hitting him, slapping him, punching him, shoving him. literally how do people not understand slapping your male partner is bad. people tend to find this funny in media and society and its weird. KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF YOUR PARTNER WITHOUT PERMISSION.
I come from a family of very forward and manipulative women and i see it in media all the time. it’s fucked and people need to not be accepting of young girls acting like snot-nosed, abusive shit heads that think they can get away with manipulation and cruelty because they happen to be girls.
and let me add this. ABUSIVE TEEN GIRLFRIENDS TURN INTO ABUSIVE GROWN ASS WOMEN GIRLFRIENDS WHO TURN INTO ABUSIVE WIVES.
if you have an abusive teen or young adult gf right now fellas, leave. don’t let her use you to get her shit right. you’ll be so fucked up by the time she gets it together if she ever does and believe that most likely she won’t.
Can i just add that ive seen young queer girls do this to their girlfriends. Girls can be abusers and you are right to leave.
Women/young girls can definitely be just as abusive. I knew a young man that got ran over and had his leg broken by his girlfriend because (in her words he annoyed her) He refused to press charges.
Another young lady started to hit her ex boyfriend because he wouldn’t take her back because of the abuse. He called the cops on her and they literally started laughing at him because she was very petite in comparison to him. Anyone can be abusive and I wish more people understood that.
dammit I’d spam my blog if i reblog this more than once but dude this is really important.
I’ve debated for a while about sharing this, but I think it’s important, and, to be fair, plenty of antis have shared the stories of their abuse.
So:
I support people creating romantic content similar to my abuse, even though that content contributed to my abuse.
Let me explain. I was very, very into Twilight when I was around 14. A couple years later a girl called me her lamb, and used the romanticization of jealousy and danger from that novel to excuse things like cutting me, stealing my phone, and demanding my passwords. Among other things. This continued until the end of high school, and it ripped apart every significant relationship in my life without anyone really realizing what was happening.
It’s definitely true that I didn’t recognize jealousy as abuse instead of romance. It’s true that I didn’t recognize “I love you” and “you can’t love anyone but me” as contradictions, and a part of that mentality came from the media I consumed. And she sure as fuck sent me fic – even forced me to write fic – which echoed those values. On a very base level, it is easy to blame my abuse on that fiction, on the unhealthy ideas of romance it gave me. For several years after getting out, I did blame romance like Twilight. I got angry when people I loved enjoyed it, and I thought I was protecting them by demanding that they stop.
But I was wrong.
Let me go out another level.
First of all, I grew up in a deeply homophobic town. There were exactly no adults in my life that I could have even told that I was in a relationship with a girl, let alone that I thought something was wrong. Abuse thrives in silence.
Second of all, I’d been homeschooled most of my life, which meant I had zero education on healthy relationships. I had no context outside of romance novels and fan fiction, which no adults knew I was reading. My view of romance was shaped by media because there were no other sources even trying to compete.
Third of all – and maybe this is most important – writing that fanfic, while in that situation, gave me a voice to things that I couldn’t even admit I was feeling. I wrote fic where a human loved a vampire, but they were scared, they were so scared, it felt like having a gun to their head all the time. They were so scared even as they loved the vampire, and they wanted them, and they wanted to help, and they wanted to be better. (She didn’t like that fic.) It took years before I would call what I experienced abuse, or seek out resources for victims. But fiction gave me a voice right then, when I needed one most.
Media didn’t get me abused. A society which failed utterly at telling me what a healthy relationship looked like got me abused. Parents and teachers and authority figures who were wildly homophobic got me abused. Fiction contributed, but if it wasn’t Twilight, it would have been something else – hell, apparently she repeated the same pattern after me with 50 Shades, and then with Captain America (somehow). Because above all, my abuser got me abused. She used fiction as a tool, but it could have been anything. If I hadn’t read Twilight, it would have been Johnlock, or Drarry, or Russia/America. All those things had more than enough content which portrayed danger and jealousy as sexy.
Do I still read Twilight? Fuck no, it’s a huge trigger. But I’ve stopped blaming it for what happened, because it was never Twilight’s job to teach me about romance. Nor was it fandom’s job to tell me, “if someone actually terrifies you, that’s dangerous, even if it’s sexy. If you love someone but they’re hurting you, you need help, not to try to fix them.” What hurt me most wasn’t fiction; it was the silence from every other quarter.
Media isn’t education on healthy relationships. It can’t be, and it never will be. “Fan fiction made me think that this was ok” means that there were no voices in our lives that we trusted more than fanfiction telling us that it wasn’t okay.
There will always be media that abusers can twist to make it look like what they’re doing is romantic and okay. Always. The abuse is still their fault, and the inability to counter harmful messages is the silence of society’s fault.
I’ll leave you with this: after I got out, I continued reading fic that featured jealousy and possessiveness as something hot. Because I did think it was hot; I now just knew firsthand that it was a kink to only be indulged in controlled situations. Firsthand experience is the harshest teacher, but it does work.
I just tag my own fic that features jealousy and possessiveness as “#abusive behavior.” Because if there is another girl like me out there, being sent these fics by her abuser, stuck in a situation she doesn’t understand – well, if it wasn’t my fic, it’d be someone else’s. The kink’s going to keep on existing. But maybe she’ll see the tag and figure something out.
Fiction is a tool, and taking one tool away won’t stop an abuser, because fiction isn’t causing abuse. If it wasn’t fiction, it’d be something else.
Stop blaming fiction for the actions of a cruel person, and the silence of the people who should have been protecting you.
It hurts to lay the blame at the feet of those you love, but if we deny the problems we will never fix them.
Be safe. Be kind.
I understand that it’s not the fault of a fiction that others get abused BUT I can’t be the only person who feels that aiming a fiction at young girls/boys who are at a very susceptible age, marketing it as hot romance, as a beautiful romance, as exciting. Then doing the same with the films is totally unacceptable.
If we give our young people very bad veiws of what a healthy romance is in fiction and then fail to educate them via home or school what chance do they have.
My daughter read Twilight and 50 shares of grey (at 15), and because I have been talking to her and answering her questions (and there were lots) since she could talk. She could see them for what they were.( She gave me a lecture on why they were bad) Many males and females do not have this at home or at school, so how are they supposed to sort it out in their heads.
Personally, and I know it isn’t fashionable to have these thoughts, I think fiction does have a responsibility not it aim stuff like this at kids and to NSFW tag ect to let people know it’s not for under 18. Iam as I said old fashioned.
Hi! So, first of all: I totally agree that adult content should be tagged NSFW. I think that, overall, a clear distinction between content for adults and minors is a good thing in media and something that helps with a lot of issues.
I also agree, to a degree, that media marketed specifically at people under at a fairly young age needs to be held to more stringent standards than media marketed to people who are older. Based on the ratings systems that most countries have adopted, this is a pretty universal position.
However!
I wanted to use this as a bit of a launching off point, because
If we give our young people very bad veiws of what a healthy romance is in fiction and then fail to educate them via home or school what chance do they have
is a very good point. I stand by the idea that censoring media does relatively little, but does that mean we just abandon kids who don’t have the support in their home or school to learn about these things? Well, no. I don’t think it’s anybody else’s responsibility, per se, but I think a lot of us can relate to that situation and want to help, so I wanted to talk a little about some things that I do that I think can be actually helpful to kids in this position.
Get politically involved to support better sex education. A lot of these decision are made at a local level – some as small as at the school-board level – which means any participation has a big impact. Even if you’re a student – especially if you’re a student – this is something you can do right now. Here’s a real basic breakdown of how to do some district-level activism. While this doesn’t instantly help kids in the situation, comprehensive and accurate sex and relationship education in schools is the only long-term solution to this problem.
Support resources aiming to help kids that aren’t getting this information elsewhere. Planned Parenthood’s a common one; Scarleteen and Sex Etc. are two other sites specifically directed at teens that are lgbtq+ friendly and aimed at education. If you know of an organization that’s working to educate teens about these things, support them.
Write meta. At the fandom & community level, I think that meta is one of the things that is the most underrated in this discussion. Meta is part of what helped me realize that what was depicted in Twilight – and therefore what had happened to me – was abuse. If you see abuse, or other problematic things, in fandom, I think putting together a well-structured argument for why you think that is one of the best tools available for education. (In the current fandom climate it might be necessary to put a disclaimer of “This isn’t meant as a condemnation of people who enjoy this media, but just a discussion of it” might be necessary. I don’t think that takes away from its power at all.)
Pay attention to how work is getting tagged. If you’re a consumer of “problematic” content, keep a close eye on the tagging being used in your community. Lots of people get sloppy after a while, if they’re posting a lot and used to only interacting within the community (myself included). Gentle reminders of “hey, this really should be tagged with [X]” from within the community are going to be way, way, way more effective than attacks from outside the community.
There’s a lot that can be done to help teens that aren’t getting the kind of education they need and deserve while at home; I just don’t really agree that restriction the kind of fictional content allowed to exist on public sites that allow adult content on the basis of “but what if young people get the wrong idea?” is an effective method of combatting this problem.
this post is such a good post.
one thing I’d add:
recognize and talk about fiction in the context of the society it’s from. for instance, Twilight and 50 SoG both romanticize abusive relationships. However, they didn’t spring out of a vacuum. They were written, marketed, and praised as great romance stories because in America – the country where both stories were written – abusive relationships are treated as romantic in real life, and the possessive, overbearing, controlling behavior is proof of a man’s love, not warning signs of an abuser.
as visible, slightly removed depictions of what women/afab people are often told to want irl by all signs around them, Twilight and 50SoG were easy vehicles to abuse for abusers in fandom spaces. but they can also be a great vehicle for showing how disturbing and abusive these relationships actually are in reality. recognizing how stories like this are part of a whole can help young fandom members more clearly see how the real world pushes dangerous ideas, and how to avoid being hurt by them.
I feel like basically all of my concerns about Twilight and 50SoG would be solved if they’d been published with some sort of tag or disclaimer saying that the relationships depicted in those stories are abusive, and in the case of 50SoG that real BDSM is not like this.
If we could normalize AO3 style tagging as a thing that mainstream books have in the foreword or something, that’d be awesome. Although to be fair, I’m pretty sure Stephanie Meyer wouldn’t be willing to tag Twilight, and I’m guessing the same is true for whoever wrote 50SoG (I can’t remember the author’s name). But if editors went ‘hey, we won’t publish this unless it’s appropriately tagged’, that would be awesome.
I literally couldn’t care less if we lose good bands and good movies if it means outing sexual predators. Let it all fall apart if that’s what it takes to stop allowing these disgusting people safe places to abuse their power. Fuck your favorite movies, fuck your favorite tv shows, fuck your favorite albums. Stop defending bad people because they make good content.
not to be a bitter asshole but the overwhelming “my gf is perfect and relationships between women are are all pure and perfect” culture on here is annoying. there are a lot of us out here being used, cheated on, dumped, abused, having communication issues and shitty breakups, and lesbian culture is not a binary of “im alone and pining after an imaginary perfect gf” or “i have a perfect gf”. it does baby lesbians and bi women a disservice. don’t feel like there’s something wrong with you if you have bad dates or weird dates or women treat you like shit or trespass your boundaries and in general don’t act like perfect magical moon princesses and your relationship isn’t a magical dream of cat ownership and cuddling. women are people too, and that means women are flawed too. there are wonderful women out there and you will find one someday to build your life with but there are a lot of assholes out there too, you’re not failing at anything if you date one of them. and you have the capability of being a shitty asshole too!
Boy there’s a lot of defensive creeps on this post!
“I’m a lesbian in a perfect relationship and I would never downplay that so that other lesbians aren’t jealous that’s ridiculous“
jesus, yeah this is definitely about jealousy not lesbians and bi women in toxic or straight up abusive relationships feeling isolated and wanting to change that!
A key reason why some believe LGBTQ IPV to be rare may be due to an assumption that LGBTQ people are inherently nonviolent. This may be particularly the case for sexual minority women. In contrast to the aggression often associated with culturally prominent masculinity norms, many lesbian women are socialized to perceive relationships involving two women as a peaceful and ideal “lesbian utopia.” Unfortunately, this powerful stereotype can impede lesbian female victims’ ability to recognize that a partner’s behavior is in fact abusive rather than normal.26 For example, in reflecting on her same-gender IPV victimization back in the 1990s, Julie describes the ubiquity of the lesbian utopia ideal in the United Kingdom that prevented her from discussing the abuse with anyone: “Well it was during a period where everyone was just raving about erm how brilliant woman-to-woman relationships were and also I don’t think anyone believed that one woman could do that to another woman—there was just no, no sense of reality around that at all. There was sort of a political euphoria about lesbianism at the time; well not even lesbianism, just woman-to-woman relationships.”27 Echoing these sentiments, a victim of female same-gender IPV in the United States explains the powerful influence the lesbian utopia ideal had on her ability to recognize the abuse: “No—I thought, well, I just thought that it was fine because we were girls, like, and girls don’t hurt each other like that. So I just thought that it was the way it was supposed to be.”28
– LGBTQ Intimate Partner Violence: Lessons for Policy, Practice, and Research by Adam M. Messinger
An example of what can happen when a group of people are glorified
This is exactly how I got into an emotionally abusive relationship. My other bi friends had told me “relationships with women are better because there aren’t power dynamics like there are between women and men.”
I doublethought (doublethunk?) my way back to “this isn’t a power dynamic” every time I felt demeaned and afraid, because “there are no power dynamics between women,” so I couldn’t have been living one.
Lesbianism-as-purity stuff terrifies me now, y’all.
I’ve spoken about this before. One of the advantages of hands-on, community-building LGBTQIAP+ activism is that I had the opportunity to talk directly to hundreds of people and counsel them on a whole variety of concrete issues. By far the thorniest problem I was faced with was intimate partner violence within relationships between women. Many abused women came to me in emotionally fragile states, yet adamantly refused to do anything more than talk with me in confidence – such as speak to one of our official counselors or to a support group, never bloody mind even the idea of filing any kind of charges against their girlfriends!
Within the community, they were taught the idea that same-gender relationships between women were not only inherently ‘better’ and had ‘less capacity for containing abuse’ than other kinds of relationships (particularly straight ones), but that ‘airing their dirty laundry in public’ (talking publicly about their abuse) would be a damaging act toward the LGBTQIAP+ community as a whole, as it would give homophobes more dirt to fling in our direction. Given my disgust toward everything related toward purity politics and respectability politics, you can imagine what my stance toward the above is – I value truth, transparency and not throwing domestic abuse survivors under the fucking bus a hell of a lot more than I value us presenting a sanitized, artificially clean image to the world, when we should all know by now that our most irrational detractors would continue to hate us even if we were the human incarnations of purity! There’s a subset of people you just cannot win over and I’d rather have them crow like broken records about the problems within the community, rather than glossing over said problems and doing a hell of a lot of damage to young queer people in the process!
Before anyone starts screaming – the takeaway people should be taking from this isn’t ‘so now I can’t talk about my perfect WLW relationship?’ or ‘you people want to trash the image of lesbians!’ or other barmy shit like that. No, the message is ‘same-sex relationships between women fall on a scale that’s much more complex than ‘shades of soft, pastel-pink’, the way Tumblr all too often presents them.’ Queer women are people. Queer women are humans and as such, we’re as fallible and mistake-prone as anyone else on this Earth, no matter how much we might pretend that we’re some sort of ‘evolved form of person.’ We’re not exempt from perpetuating toxic, abusive models within our relationships and trying to ignore that does us all an enormous disservice.
Emotional abuse works like this:
You are screamed at, and then, not knowing any better, you stand up for yourself.
You think this is a way of being strong. You think this is a defense tactic.
But this only provokes more screaming. Going silent provokes more screaming too, but usually it keeps the threats to the minimum. It keeps it just at screaming and not: a shove down the stairs, or order to pack your stuff and get out.
So you learn how to go silent. How to play dead. How to cry without making a noise. How to swallow noise. How to wipe your cheeks, get out of the car, and go about your day. How to dismantle the lump in your throat so you stop choking in the grocery store. How to perk up when people look at your straight-line brows and teeth-sucking frown and say, smile! How to go into a corner and hide in your head.
You learn.
And when the screaming has stopped, when the two of you are in the car or out to dinner and they’re all smiles, all asking for favors, all questions, you are still sucking on your shaky-shouldered anger. You are still hurt and annoyed and want to ask them, how? How can you speak to me like that? How can you pretend you did not say those things? How can you have forgotten?
But you’ve learned. So you listen to, “Can I borrow your key”s and “how was your day”s and you go silent. You play dead. You swallow the noise. And sometimes it doesn’t matter who is speaking to you, it doesn’t matter if they’ve told you “stop talking or I’ll do something I’ll regret,” it doesn’t matter if they’re a friend, it doesn’t matter if their criticism is constructive, it doesn’t matter. You’ve learned. Any sort of speaking, any raising of the voice, any insult and you play dead.
Do you know how many dogs I’ve met that get scared or anxious around men because in their previous home men hit them? A lot, and they are very protective of the women who have adopted them now.
Men who are violent towards women are often violent towards animals as well. They think we’re all chattel. If a man wants you to choose between your dog or cat or him, dump the guy. Those animals will love you for the rest of your life, loyal and true.
Actually, I have something to add.
The other day I saw a story where a woman was asking why her dogs had suddenly started growling at her boyfriend whenever he was in the same room as her son.
And my immediate thought was ‘that boyfriend has hurt the kid somehow.’
Spoilers: that was exactly the case.
Trust ur dogs when they say something is off.
The first time my sister came to visit, via plane, after I got my dog, pupper growled at her and wouldn’t go near her for the first day. Next visit was by car (two day drive)and pupper LOVED my sister. They snuggled and played and none of us could figure out why the change. We thought maybe the scent of my sisters cat had lingered on her clothes, making that first visit a rough one. Whereas when she came by car, the scent had had time to wear off. Well that was partially true…
Fast forward about six months when I went north to visit my family. My sister walked into my parents’ house and pupper ran to greet my sister. Stopped dead in her tracks and started growling and barking. Hackles raised, full protection mode. My sisters husband had just walked in behind her.
My precious puppy wanted NOTHING to do with him. She barked, growled, ran away, and sat between him and my sister. Y’all my dog had spent maybe a weekend a half around my sister but protected her like this was her flesh and blood.
Eventually, my sister filed for divorce on grounds of “Extreme and repeated mental, emotional, and sexual abuse.” Divorce was final in less than a month because her claims were substantiated.
Trust the dog, honey. They KNOW.
I’ve never owned dogs, but I used to work with horses (which are a lot like big dogs).
There was this one horse I worked with named Tonto. He was a doll. He followed me like a puppy, snuck treats out of my pocket, he was the sweetest thing. We were practically inseparable.
A guy I was considering dating came to visit me one day, and Tonto wanted NOTHING to do with him. Normally well behaved, he shoved himself between us and would NOT let this guy near me. He was stomping, acting really aggressive, and tried to bite the guy. This horse was practically dragging me back toward the barn. At that moment, despite being like, 17, I knew something was up, and ultimately things didn’t pan out for guy and me.
A year later I found out he had lied about his age (he said he was 18 but he was actually 27) he was arrested for sexually assaulting an 11 year old girl.
Stop abusing your boyfriends and yes what you are doing is abuse.
Stop:
Yelling at him in front of his friends
Hitting or slapping him when he does or says something you don’t like
Telling him he doesn’t have a choice when it comes to decisions that involve both of you
Telling him he can’t hang out with friends because you don’t like him
Telling him to not talk to other girls even if they are his friend
Forcing him to spend every moment with you
Belittling him and pointing out all his flaws
Calling him stupid or making fun of him for making a mistake
Threatening to break up with him if he doesn’t do what you want
Being emotionally manipulative and crying until he does what you want
Accusing him of cheating every time he’s not with you
Blow up is phone if he doesn’t text you every five minutes
Telling him you are the must thing that has ever happened to him and no one else will love
Physically attacking him when ever you are mad
Forcing him to have sex despite that fact that he said he didn’t want to
Invading his privacy by going through his phone
Getting mad at him for changing his password and demanding he tell you what it is
If a guy did any of these things to a girl it would be considered abuse but since its the other way around its considered normal. Throughout High school I saw many girl treating their boyfriends like shit. Sometime even physically abusing them in the hallways and no one trying to stop it because its a girl attacking a boy.
Boys: If your girlfriend does anything on this list leave her. It is abuse and you deserve better.
Girls: if you find your self doing anything on this list to your boyfriend you need to knock it off because you are being abusive.
!!!!!!!!
My brother was abused by his babies mom and it started like this and escalated to child abuse and neglect.
You don’t deserve to be screamed at, ignored, or assaulted.
Not showing affection when she wants or not hugging her before class) or missing a phone call doesn’t warrant getting cussed out or hit.
Lol, I lost 5 followers from reblogging this. That’s fine, y’all can go
Whole lot of grown women do this too.
Just wanna throw these in too
Being passive aggressive with him when he wants to spend time with friends or doing other things
controlling when he’s able to go out with friends
Breaking up his friendships with other girls just because you’re insecure
Making him feel like his opinions in decisions that affect the both of you are irrelevant and don’t matter
testing him in anyway in general without his knowledge or permission (example: catfishing! it’s manipulative and weird don’t fucking do that)
taking money/credit cards without permission to spend on things without his knowledge ( had an ex friend do this constantly to her boyfriend and she’d always condone it because “he’ll get over it” )
guilting him for hanging out with friends/family over you and making him choose between you and friends/family
telling him “you don’t love me if you *insert harmless activity he wants to do here* “
being rude or mean to him in front of others to assert dominance or power over him
downloading apps to spy on his phone activity (yes, this is a thing “”regular”” people do) or snooping on his social media to see who he’s talking to
hitting him, slapping him, punching him, shoving him. literally how do people not understand slapping your male partner is bad. people tend to find this funny in media and society and its weird. KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF YOUR PARTNER WITHOUT PERMISSION.
I come from a family of very forward and manipulative women and i see it in media all the time. it’s fucked and people need to not be accepting of young girls acting like snot-nosed, abusive shit heads that think they can get away with manipulation and cruelty because they happen to be girls.
Basically anything you see in cheesy high school set movies DO NOT DO.
Steel Phoenix Studios 