Tag: avengers

nestofstraightlines:

jewishdragon:

rameldrive:

writing-prompt-s:

Your super power is that you are average, at everything you do.

no, no- imagine how amazing this would be! you’re average- but the key here is at EVERYTHING you try and do

try and get the cure to cancer? well, aint a fingers snap and done cure but its a cure. doctors worldwide are astounded

try and learn how to communicate with an alien race? well, youre not fluent but its passing and humanity hasnt even invented deep space flight- you just managed to get their signal and have a chat

want to fly? well- youre a bit wobbly but goddamn its working

being average at everything is amazing bc if we assume anything you try works then eveything is at least working a bit

Jack of all trades, master of none, better than a master of one

You’re assuming ‘average’ means ‘mediocre’ though. But average means the most statistically normal. So because a very few people in the world’s population have the aptitude and education to make a breakthrough in cancer research, the average ability to cure cancer across the human race is basically zero. Therefore Average Jo as this person must surely be named would have no greater aptitude than the next person.

It depends how the power gauges averages. Does it always take the entire world’s population as it’s pool? Or does it go by population of immediate surroundings?

Cos the latter could be a cool power. You sneak in to an army camp and suddenly are a decent enough soldier to pass muster and fight. You go to Avengers hq and the presence of superpowered people in the local pool means average is suddenly ‘mildly but superhumanly strong and able to at least hover’. You’re only a kid but you find that if you go and study at the local University campus you’re suddenly a lot more knowledgeable. Also mildly tipsy and high unfortunately.

Also, I think Average Jo would fight Spiders Georg.

love-the-avenger:

 

drop-deaddream:

findalittletrouble:

natasha is beating them at strip-chitauri-kill

No, wait, we have to talk about this, because I honestly can’t decide what’s better here. Is it that it’s so toasty outside Clint took off his jacket and Steve felt the need to flash some cleavage? Is it Nat casually gesturing with loaded weaponry while she tells terrible dad jokes? Is it the resigned exasperation on Steve’s face? We just don’t know. 

#but seriously imagine them getting bored killing the enemy’s drones or whatever#and they make a game out of it#and it’s summer and so why NOT make it a stripping game eh??#I feel like thor would just strip either way like ‘fucking FINALLY I can take these infernal pants off’#their butts are all over the news the next day#Fox News won’t shut up about how much of terrible influence they are to children#or some shit like that idk 

this pic is now my most favourite thing in the whole entire world

Avengers: the funny books

laporcupina:

The Avengers cost money to run and while Tony’s insanely wealthy, he didn’t get to be a billionaire in addition to the genius/playboy/philanthropist by being foolish when it came to money-making opportunities. 

Thus, the comic books. 

It’s a great idea, he knows it is. With the return of Captain America, there was a resurgence of all kinds of vintage Cap memorabilia and, among them, are the comics that featured Steve and the Commandos in daring (and, by today’s standards, incredibly racist, sexist, and everything else-ist) adventures. Tony’s got still a few – Dad had the whole run – and he thinks an update will go over well. The Avengers’ PR staff wholeheartedly agree, possibly not because Tony is paying their salaries. 

The New Adventures of Captain America is first off the press, packaged with a reprint of the original Captain America #1, and they have to go to a second printing within a month. Steve himself is perfectly happy to sign copies because at least it’s not the beefcake shots that Vanity Fair dug up and ran in the January issue. 

The Black Widow comes out next and it gets mixed reviews because the girl-power message got undermined somewhat by the cheesecake art. Tony doesn’t think Natasha’s the kind of pissed that will get him murdered in his sleep, but he can’t promise the safety of the next guy who catcalls out that her boobs aren’t as big in real life. 

Invincible Iron Man is the third and, okay, maybe the title’s a bit much, but c’mon, since when has humbleness been part of his toolkit? It’s a detective story with lasers, which is precisely what he asked for. That, and to make him look as tall as Cap if they were ever in the same panel. 

Thor has plenty of suggestions for his book’s story arcs, which is why the writer is credited as “scripted by.”

Bruce won’t give permission for anything to do with the Hulk, despite Tony’s assurance that this is a way to ‘demonster’ the Other Guy. Bruce says the Other Guy is a monster and should stay that way. Tony tries a few more times, but Bruce won’t budge. Which is why Tony’s sidekick in his own book is a genius named Bruce, no last name given. 

Clint will let them do a Hawkeye book, but the creative team is left to their own devices because he won’t even return their texts or emails. What results is possibly payback because it’s not even a superhero story. It’s an ironic hipster drama where the putative hero is really a shlemiel who is a complete failure at everything but being a superhero. Hawkeye is a runaway success, however, and wins an Eisner. Clint won’t go to the awards ceremony.

When Tony finally sees Barton’s home – and gets over the shock that it is a farm with cows and chickens and a wife and children – he notices that there is not only a framed and autographed copy of Hawkeye #1 under glass in the family room, but there is a commissioned full-color drawing by the series artist. Clint might not want anything to do with it, but Laura Barton is very sure this is the most hysterical thing in the history of ever and trawls eBay for merchandise. It’s been a shitball of a day, of a week, but the mischievous smile Laura gives him when he promises he can hook her up at the source makes it a tiny bit less awful.