Tag: captain america: civil war

I’m rewatching Civil War and it occurs to me that Sam Wilson is most definitely not the Sane One. He tries to outrun the supersoldier that already lapped him three times in his first appearance. He purposely antagonizes the guy that just tore through a UN superjail. He’s the only one that doesn’t address T’Challa as “your highness” and tries to start snarky banter. Point is, Natasha was the Responsible One. Or Clint or Pepper. Sam is one of the crazy idiots who constantly need bail money.

lazulisong:

withoutsurcease:

stele3:

fatcr0w:

ageisia:

fatcr0w:

THANK YOU.

Everyone writes Sam as the replacement Bucky but guys, Bucky is trying to go into hiding because there are now TWO Steves on the loose. 

TWO of them. 

The only thing that makes him seem relatively sane is the lack of super abilities but anyone who thinks it’s a reasonable idea to attach a LIVE JET ENGINE ten inches from his asshole is nOT SANE. 

Bucky went into cryogenic sleep because there were two Steves on the loose. He spent an hour or two with Sam, saw where this was going, and was just like “I’m out.”

Those two are probably giving Clint an ulcer right now.  And being a terrible influence on Scott and Wanda.  

I wonder if anyone ever told Clint who T’Challa is.  T’Challa seems like he actually would be a Responsible One, but he’s got his own country to deal with so he doesn’t usually get involved unless it’s potentially world ending.  

They fix up Bucky within months of putting him under because Sam and Steve haven’t sat still for even like, ten??? minutes?

T’Challa raises him from the artic like uhm, you gonna need to go collect ya mans.

Bucky is like “Oh gOD what did Steve do????”

“No not that one, he’s been too Sad and Lost™ without you but the cute one has decided to try his hand at decentralizing the corrupt governance of Klaegia like, four hours plane ride south. Come on the jet’s already packed”

The Dora Milaje have to keep Bucky from smashing the refrost button to go back under he’s Done.

Sam Wilson met Steve THREE TIMES and was like, “oh you want to overthrow the American government great LET’S DO THIS.” Sam Wilson’s first act in that effort was to suggest that they steal his backpack jet, right from where he KNEW IT WAS GOING TO BE, almost as if he’d kept his eye on it the whole time and was maybe, y’know, planning to nab it himself at some point. Sam Wilson never met a superassassin or a king or a government agent that he didn’t want to sass and antagonize.

Sam Wilson is not the Sane One. You have been lied to.

“no not that one”

L M A O ACTUALLY I HAVE AN ENTIRE SOULMATE AU THEORY BASED ON THE FACT THAT SAM AND STEVE ARE BASICALLY TWINSIES AND BUCKY SPENDS HIS ENTIRE LIFE LIKE “WHAT IF THAT RILEY GUY HAD SURVIVED AND I HAD SOMEONE TO HELP ME RUN HERD ON THESE DUMB ASSES”