Tag: harry potter series

deadcatwithaflamethrower:

starofthemourning:

kyraneko:

uncontinuous:

uncontinuous:

AU where Minerva McGonagall has a little less faith in Albus Dumbledore so she does agree to leave Harry at the Dursleys.

But then proceeds to move right in next door with her wife because Albus never said that she couldn’t.

So Harry grows up with two grandmalike aunties next door, who basically finnagle him into living with them in all but name. It’s great, until he gets to Hogwarts because he keeps accidentally calling McGonagall Aunt Min instead of Professor.

The more I think about this the better it gets because suddenly a small biracial orphan appearing on the Dursley’s doorstep is less scandalous and gossip worthy in the
pasty ass white suburbia of Privet Drive, when it’s compared to the elderly lesbian interracial couple who moved in next door.

Okay this has an amazing amount of potential for Harry, but I am very filled with curiosity about Minerva’s wife.

1) Who is she? and more importantly

2) How did this marriage come to pass?

I mean I am all for Minerva McGonagall having had a wife already at this juncture in her life, but consider 

1) Utter BAMF who is acknowledged to be out of everyone’s league Minerva McGonagall walking into a Ministry break room full of lady Aurors and the like and saying, “I have a child that needs looking after and a neighborhood full of prats who need scandalizing and will marry the first woman to say yes” and there is a moment’s shock and then the verbal equivalent of half a dozen bridesmaids diving for the bouquet with one clear winner who was a split second faster on the uptake and they end up in love by the time Harry is old enough to toddle properly.

2) The house next door is being sold by the daughter of its occupant who just inherited it and wants nothing to do with Little Whinging except to inflict herself on all the narrow-minded bastards long enough to get a good price for it; when Minerva walks in the door there is a mental adjustment that leaves her swooning (or maybe that’s Minerva) and after tea, dinner, and certain other activities she invites Minerva to live with her instead of selling it.

3) Minerva specifically tracks down the schoolmate she knows to be best at making stupid people regret everything, and asks her to pretend to be her wife, share a house in Little Whinging with her, and help keep an eye on Harry Potter. Both of them solidly overestimated their ability to keep the relationship fake.

@deadcatwithaflamethrower

I love the variants of this that have cropped up of late, it’s fantastic.

hufflepuffs-say-fuck:

thebloodybitchdragon:

rehfan:

cheeseanonioncrisps:

headcanonsandmore:

ginniewheezie:

dtwizzie:

spn-is-bae-girl:

remedial-potions:

melodyrae14:

itsraininbritishmen:

floateron:

CHECK OUT your differences in wand technique here and how fluidly and casually Ron throws a curse in comparison to Harry and Hermione Hermione has done the reading and is technically perfect of course Elbow straight; wrist bent Wand tip aligned with left sightline left arm held loosely behind her for balance Harry hasn’t ever done the reading Grip too tight; elbow locked Shoulders raised Left elbow cranked in awkwardly against his body Kids’ll imitate his awful technique and Junior Aurors it’ll make their parents nuts; don’t twist your neck like that I don’t care what Auror Potter does When you save wizardkind you can hold your wand however you want until then drop your shoulders Ron’s been around wand users since birth practiced with twigs and then his brothers’ wands Look at how the movement flows from his center the way he uses his whole body throws out his opposite hand behind him to counterbalance the movement Harry and Hermione get their wands into position and then throw the curse Ron’s spell starts mid-motion because he knows his wand will be in position in time  (helenish)

Mmmmmmm, yes.

There will be a day when I see this and I will scroll past.

Today is not that day

Plus Ron is casting his curse non-verbally. That’s very difficult and it requires training and practice to successfully cast a nonverbal spell. It’s success is determined by the amount of concentration and mental discipline of the witch or wizard. But this is Ron Weasley he likely didn’t put training and practice into casting non-verbal spells, this advanced magic comes to him naturally. The only other time we see him cast a non-verbal spell is when he accidentally made it snow in the great hall, and that was only because Lavender was glaring him down after he said Hermione’s name while he was unconscious in the hospital wing. He felt crappy and his emotions were so intense he unknowingly made it snow. Here he’s trapped in a muggle cafe, with his best friend and the girl he loves. He’s probably scared, and angry but most of all protective. He wants to defeat these Death Eaters without anything happening to his team. His emotions are intense again and that allows him to cast a powerful non-verbal spell. No, not even a spell, a curse. We’ve seen Hermione cast non-verbal spells loads of times but even here she says the curse to ensure it’s potency. Ron is concentrated and disciplined enough in this moment to curse a Death Eater without any words at all.

and isn’t his “eat slugs” curse also non-verbal? because I doubt that “eat slugs” is the actual incantation for that curse and actually if I recall correctly from the book, he says “eat slugs, Malfoy” in an “eff off” sort of way but his wand isn’t even out. then a minute later when Malfoy calls Hermione a Mudblood, he takes out his wand and it backfires on him. and he’s TWELVE when he does this! it’s another moment where his emotions are running high because his friend has just been called the most awful word he’s ever heard.

Ron is a great wizard, so much of his magic is natural and intuitive and he doesn’t have to think about it the way Harry and even Hermione do. it’s just a part of him.

AND NO ONE GIVES HIM ANY FUCKING CREDIT ITS LIKE “OH LOOK ITS THAT STUPID WEASLEY AGAIN” YOU KNOW WHAT FUCK YOU BITCHES RON FUCKING WEASLEY IS A BOSS ASS BITCH AND YOU CAN JUST NOT!
*straightens robes*
But us Ravenclaws are still cool right? Sorry for my outburst professor McGonagall.

This is the kind of quality content I crave!

I am down for Ron being a more powerful wizard than anyone, including Molly, ever gave him credit for.

 I AM DOWN FOR ALL OF THIS! RON WEASLEY IS SUCH A GOOD WIZARD AND NO-ONE EVER GIVES HIM CREDIT FOR IT!

This actually fits very well into a fan theory that I read once. Basically, the Weasley family are secretly very talented at magic, and very sensitive to it as a result.

That’s why Ginny was so strongly affected by the diary, and why Ron was later so affected by the locket. Even in Goblet of Fire, JK Rowling mentions specifically that Ron has the most trouble shaking off Moody’s imperius curse. He also seems to be particularly susceptible to Fleur’s Veela powers.

This could also explain why Fred and George were able to create a swamp that impressed even Flitwick, before they even finished school, how Percy got top marks in all 12 of his OWLs  and why Charlie and Bill do so well with magical creatures.

Arthur Weasley enchanted a flying car, which looks like it would have been very complex, and Molly Weasley regularly performs nonverbal spells— INCLUDING A BLOODY KILLING CURSE. “Not my daughter, you bitch!” is not an incantation.

The whole Weasley clan is actually incredibly in tune with magic and nobody ever notices.

But what this means is that, not only is Ron a very talented wizard, but it also suggests that his abandoning Ron and Hermione in Deathly Hallows (which is the thing that is most often held up as a reason to hate Ron) wasn’t just him being selfish and jealous.

He wasn’t imagining it, he actually was affected more by the horcrux that Harry or Hermione.

And I’m only saying this because no one in the previous posts has out-and-out mentioned it: The Weasley family is one of the Sacred 29 families – purebloods stretching back centuries.

Not to be too Slytherin about it, but I’m thinking that counts for something too.

The Slug Vomiting Charm he uses in second year is indeed a nonverbal casting, as the incantation for it, at least according to the wiki, is Slugulus Eructo.

So yes, Ron managed to nonverbally cast a hex at age twelve, that, despite it backfiring on him, worked exactly as it was supposed to. With a broken, hand-me-down wand that was never quite right for him.

Step up your damn game, Harry “But I Am The Chosen One” Potter and Hermione “I’ve Read The Entire Library Twice” Granger.

Nothing to do with hufflepuff but that’s gold

notesoftruth:

unified-multiversal-theory:

accio-shitpost:

how good would it be if luna, who believes in the crumple-horned snorckack and nargles, thought that dinosaurs were made up by muggles

Okay, but consider:

Someone (probably Hermione) takes Luna to a muggle museum of natural history, in a last ditch effort to convince her that dinosaurs really did exist. They go through all of it: full and partial skeletons on display, fossil imprints of skin textures, a little video about carbon dating, exhibits on the evolution of all life from tiny one-celled sea creatures, bird-hipped vs. lizard-hipped, living giant isopods and coelacanths, the whole spiel about how the dinosaurs aren’t actually completely gone, since some, like the anchiornis and archaeopteryx, were the predecessors from which today’s birds – including every owl in the Wizarding World – evolved.

Luna takes all this in with her usual calm demeanor until the very end, when her eyes seem to grow even more enormous in her face, but doesn’t say anything. After a full minute of Luna’s silent astonishment, her companion prods her for a response. “Of course!” Luna exclaims, “no wonder I’ve never found them. I’ve been going about things the wrong way!” She launches into a lengthy explanation that the records that she and her father have been using for references were copies of copies of copies of absolutely ancient scripts, so in order to find the creatures as described in them, she needed to be looking for fossils. 

Luna (with Rolf as her assistant) begins searching through areas of Wizarding Britain, using magical equivalents of the muggle tools she read about at the museum (a variation on Tempus to determine the age of a magical item or creature, Cryptozoam Revelio as a substitute for ground-penetrating radar). She finds the remains of a number of magical creatures from various ages, as well as accidentally uncovering a nest of Knuckers, a relative of the dragon previously thought to be extinct. After this discovery, she and Rolf are given a bit more credence than before, and they gain the support among creature-handlers, especially dragonologists.  Because of this, they get access to more regions of the world, and their team grows. Eventually Luna ends up founding the Wizarding Archaeological Society, the first institution to combine both muggle and wizard research methods at a single institution.

On the 50th anniversary of the Society’s founding, they open a museum of their own (”Everything that was, at the WAS!”), to display the various fossils of magical creatures that they’ve managed to locate over the years. Unveiled at the opening ceremonies was what would become the pride of their collection, a diorama of Crumple-Horned Snorkacks in every stage of development, along with details about their habits, average lifespan, and a map of the full range of their habitat at their peak population in the mid-17th century. Their extinction at during the 20th century was attributed to rising global temperatures, as their most flourishing period coincided with the coldest years of the Little Ice Age, and no specimens from any later than the 1976 Heat Wave had thus far been recovered. The disappearance of the Snorkacks, it was said, had been an early warning sign of the global climate change which had troubled the entire world, wizarding and muggle, for the better part of the last half-century. A cooperative partnership had been reached between the WAS and the Royal Society a scant decade after the WAS’s founding , allowing research witches and wizards to pool their resources with muggle scientists, in time to prevent a catastrophe that the wizarding world would otherwise have been unlikely to survive.

In her speech at that evening’s gala, Luna told the story of how it all happened, to reveal the person who had singlehandledly started this series of events, which resulted in not only a golden age of discovery in the field of cryptozoology, but also an era of peace and cooperation between both worlds, allowing restrictions imposed by the Statute of Secrecy to be loosened for the first time in nearly five hundred years, all in the pursuit of knowledge for its own sake.

Hermione Granger, who had been grumbling in her chair the entire time, rose when acknowledged. Luna Lovegood beamed at her aging friend, the witch who had gone from being her most skeptical critic to her most dedicated – and most challenging – supporter in a mere half-century. 

@deadcatwithaflamethrower

nonasuch:

all right. so. this is a Harry Potter AU, in rambly and abbreviated form.

  • this is a version of events where, on the morning of November 1st, 1981, the police are called to a house in Surrey.
  • when they arrive, a large man with a red face and a moustache is waiting for them, brandishing a baby.
  • to be more accurate: he is brandishing a basket. the basket contains a baby.
  • he tells the police that his wife found the basket on their doorstep that morning. “Gave her the shock of her life,” he says, with a chuckle that does not seem the least bit sincere.
  • the police officers have a lot of questions about this, but the man does not have any useful answers. his wife, he tells them, is not in any shape to be interviewed. “she’s been poorly,” he says, “and we’ve got a baby of our own to worry about, keeping us up at all hours.”
  • the baby in the basket seems to be about a year old. he is cheerful, seems healthy aside from a cut on his forehead, with a crooked sticking plaster on it. he has startlingly green eyes.
  • there is no identifying information in the basket, except for a torn scrap of paper with ‘his name is Harry’ on it in a delicate hand.
  • there is nothing else to be done, it seems. the officers take baby Harry, and leave.
  • one of them comes back a few days later for a follow-up interview with the woman who found the baby. she seems a little fragile, and her own baby, in the next room, keeps up a constant shrieking tantrum the whole time the officer is there. “I’m sorry,” the woman says, with a brittle smile. “this has all been a bit much. I recently lost my sister, you see.”

Keep reading

thebibliosphere:

wtfiswrongwithme:

keepcalmimspidey:

midoriko-sama:

the-chicken-is-not-amused:

artschoolglasses:

I will never forgive them for cutting out this scene.

Tumblr app doesn’t show this gif set but I already know what it is. No need to hesitate to reblog.

And he did this just before a road trip, stuck in the car with his parents asking what he was thinking.

The look of utter defiance Dudley gives Vernon as he steps over the fence though 

And how he does it really slowly as well as if to say “What you gonna do about it huh?”

The phone rings. It was an absurd wedding gift from his father in-law, and one which much to Harry’s surprise, had actually worked when he’d plugged it into the landline. Arthur had taken to phoning him on it, just for the pure novelty of the thing—though how they’d managed to get a BT engineer out to the Burrow without causing an incident, Harry doesn’t know. He’s not sure he wants to.

“Hello?”

“Uhm,, is this…is this the Potter residence?”

There’s a beat of silence as Harry adjusts the receiver against his ear, not quite sure he’s heard who he thinks he has. “…Dudley?”

“Yea…uhm, Harry?”

“Dudley.” Harry repeats numbly, turning to look at Ginny who is looking at him expectantly, eyebrows raised. “Uh…Christ, Dudley, hi how did…how did you find this number?”

There’s another beat of silence and the crackle of static that might have been a sigh or simply just the line breaking up. “Hi, sorry I know you probably…sorry this was stupid. I uh, I put your name in the computer and this was the only thing that came up.”

“Oh.” Harry breathes, still trying to recover his equilibrium. Ten minutes ago he’d been using his wand to clear away dinner, he’d been getting ready to sit down and read through some reports before putting the kids to bed, and now somehow, he’s talking to his muggle cousin who he hasn’t seen since… “How, how are you?”

“Good, yea” Dudley replies, seeming to rally, “You?”

“Yea, uh, doing well…”

The conversation lasts maybe a half hour, faltering and awkward. But they’re going for a coffee at the end of the week and Harry supposes…that’s…that’s a thing that is happening.

*

“Harry…”

Harry turns and looks up, and looks up some more at the looming figure blocking out the light. 

“Dudley,” he says, standing up and hoping the pang of something awful doesn’t show on his face. For a moment he thought he’d been looking at Vernon. “It’s good to see you.”

Dudley gives him a look that says he clearly knows Harry is lying, but is thankful for being humored. “You too, you’re looking good…”

They pass the  first few minutes with awkward pleasantries and even more awkward silences. But it’s…nice would be too strong a word, but it’s not bad either. He even manages to get a smile out of him when he calls him Big D, the other man shaking his head with a self depreciating eye roll.

“Dad died,” Dudley says after a while, and Harry feels an icy hot flash go down his spine, curdling in his gut.

“Oh,” he says, not quite sure how he’s supposed to feel about that, “I’m sorry to hear that.”

Dudley snorts into his coffee. “Somehow I doubt it.” and it’s not accusing, but Harry still can’t help but feel like he should defend himself. The words they locked me in a cupboard are on the cusp of his tongue but Dudley gets there before him. “There’s a lot of things…looking back…lot of things…” and it’s not an apology, not really. “Took me a long time to realize certain things weren’t right…too long.” 

Harry nods at that, because yes, it had also taken him a long time too to understand the full of extent of what had gone on in 4 Privet Drive. He still doesn’t like tight spaces.

“You realize things though, when you have kids,” Dudley carries on, shaking his head, “Like they’re just kids, how can you do that to a kid? They need you for everything.”

And Harry can relate to that too. Lily is three and Ginny is pregnant again and James already has an alarming alacrity for finding trouble and with or without magic Harry doesn’t have enough hands to deal with it all. But he loves it, and he loves them, and the thought of anyone ever treating his children the way he remembers his first eleven years of life is enough to make the electric lights over their head flicker. 

“You’ve got kids?”

“Two,” Harry says, “third one on the way. You?”

“Nice. Just the one, so far.” He hands over his phone, the image of a bright young girl with dark skin and tight ringlet curls staring back at him from the grasp of Dudley’s arms. “Effie.” He smiles ruefully at Harry’s obvious surprise. “Dad wasn’t too happy about that either.”

“She’s gorgeous.” Harry says, handing the phone back and pulling out his own wallet to reveal the moving pictures inside. 

Dudley flinches a bit at that, but he guffaws broadly when he spies James. “Cor, he don’t half look like you. No glasses though.”

“No,” Harry says, pushing his own glasses back up his nose. “He’s got his mother’s eyes, thankfully.”

“Actually, Harry, there was something I was hoping we could…talk about.”

And ah, there it is. “What about?”

“It’s…it’s about Effie…”

And when he’s done talking Harry just wants to lean back and laugh and laugh and laugh, because of course Vernon Dursley’s granddaughter is a witch, of course she is. But he doesn’t, because Dudley is doing the one thing he can think of to try and help his child, and Harry can’t fault him for that.

*

They keep in touch after that. Christmas cards, postcards—gifts for the kids on birthdays. The year Effie turns eleven—the same as James—Harry drops a casually long thought out text into the familial void.

“Diagon A this weekend, if you’re up for it?”

The text comes back quickly, a little too quickly for the way Dudders pecks at his phone whenever Harry has seen him typing. “Snds gd, 1st pint on u 😉 – Big D 🍺🍺🍺👌👍”

It’ll be painfully awkward, it always is. But it’s something.

We might have misunderstood Hogwarts Houses for years

mikkeneko:

somethingtodowithpotter:

I have a theory that the valued quality of each of the four Houses isn’t really about the personality of its students.

The valued quality of each of the four Houses has to do with how they perceive magic.

Stick with me a second: Hogwarts is a school to study magic. Magic as Hogwarts teaches it can be seen as many things: a natural talent, a gift, a weapon, etc.

So how you believe magic should be used will both reflect your personality and change how you handle that power.

“Their daring, nerve, and chivalry set Gryffindors apart,” Gryffindors perceive magic as a weapon. Gryffindors tend to excel in aggressive forms of magic, like offensive and defensive spells, and they are good at dueling. But a true Gryffindor knows that the power is a responsibility, and so they must always use their powers to stand up for what’s right. They are the sword of the righteous, which makes them as good at Defense Against the Dark Arts as they are at combat magic.

Hufflepuffs believe that magic is a gift and that the best gifts are to be given away. Hufflepuffs, “loyal and just,” would naturally abhor the idea of jealously guarding magic or using it to hurt someone else. So Hufflepuffs share their magic to benefit of Muggles, like the Fat Friar, to protect the overlooked, like Newt Scamander with his creatures, or to oppose those who would use magic to torment and bully, like the Hufflepuffs who stood with the DA and the battle of Hogwarts.

Slytherins are the opposite: they believe their magic is a treasure that they have been entrusted to protect. The Slytherin fascination with purity, with advantage, with cunning and secrecy–all of which were perverted by the Death Eaters–comes from the idea that people with magic in their veins have been given something special that it is their duty to protect at all costs. And perhaps they aren’t entirely wrong: power in the wrong hands can be dangerous. And power interfering at will with Muggle affairs is a gross presumption that could turn the course of history. Though the series shows some of the worst that Slytherin can be, “evil,” is not a natural Slytherin tendency. “Cautious,” is.

Ravenclaws believe that magic is an art form, one that is beautiful and should be appreciated and studied for its own sake. If “wit beyond measure is man’s greatest treasure,” then asking what magic is for is useless. It’s more important to immerse oneself in magic for its own sake. Ravenclaws push the boundaries of magic to see if they can, hence Hermione’s spell experiment on the DA coins being dubbed a Ravenclaw quality, but like Luna Lovegood in the pursuit of extraordinary creatures: they can also be content to plumb the depths of what already exists.

So while you can see where personalities will overlap over Houses, perhaps in Sorting we should be asking ourselves less what we think we are and more what we think we believe. 

that’s much more interesting and substantive than “brave, smart, evil, miscellaneous”