People still think of Lando as “The Guy Who Betrayed The Trio” and that’s some grade A bull.
I mean what would you do if you had people to protect and Darth Vader, Scariest Dude in the Galaxy, comes marching up to your door with a whole battalion of soldiers? Like? How much choice do you think he actually had here? Not much because Vader literally changes the rules on him every scene they’re together so the deal goes from “Trap the smuggler and his friends” to “Han’s being tortured and frozen in carbonite and taken away and the others that were supposed to be left untouched are also being taken capture indefinitely right now” and Lando has all of no control over any of it.
And then the second he realizes what’s happened he risks everything to help Chewie and Leia out. Leaves his cozy home to help them. Joins the Rebellion? Frees Han? Blows up the second Death Star?
But sure he’s just that sleaze ball who betrayed the gang. Sure.
I do not trust people who rag on Lando.
Seriously? Did they just sleep through Return of the Jedi?
Also, “They showed up here just before you did” gives us context to when Han arrives unannounced, and Lando tries to get Han to lose his cool and book out?
“ Why you slimy, double-crossing, no-good swindler. “
Lando opens with giving Han an excuse to say “Same to you Bantha herder, Chewie, we’re out”. Lando insults a smuggler known for his pride, hoping to get a rise and a reaction and risks his life to try to insult Han off the trap
“ You got a lot of guts coming here, after what you pulled!”
Also, assume that Lando’s just been ambushed by the Empire, and told that Han Solo is headed here, and that it’s the same Han Solo who just ran a blockade on Hoth, and Hoth is within non-hyperdrive flight range of Bespin.
Lando literally opens with a coded “You ran an Imperial Blockade and now you’re flying in openly at the nearest system?”
If the Han Solo of ANH and, as recently as Hoth base (Who’s scruffy looking?), had been as a hot headed as Lando expected, he would have walked back up the ramp and flown off in a huff. Lando tries to salvage the situation from before we even know there’s a problem
Lando was administrator and responsible for tens of thousands of lives. From the radio play “You should have looked around more, Han. You’d have recognized a lot of faces. A lot of people here are at the end of their ropes. This is their last chance for any kind of life.”
Yup. Lando’s actions are “Try to get Cloud City out this, try to get his friends out of this, try to get out of this himself, got out? EVACUATE THE CITY. Then save friends and self”
He could have flown off quietly, Lobot could have been instructed to prepare the escape vehicle. No, Lando gives the evac signal by announcing it’s him, and announcing the Empire has control of the city. Yeah, way to paint a target on your back there. No “Hit the fire alarm” button and run, no sneak off in the night.
Lando Calrissian was trying to save the most people possible without being willing to simply sacrifice his friends for the most efficient gain
Lando Calrissian is one of the most ethical characters in the original trilogy. He was stuck between a rock and a hard place, but he also turned on Vader/helped Leia and Chewie as soon as he could do so. We last see him in Empire setting off to help track down where Boba Fett took Han.
We see him next in Return of the Jedi, saving Han. And then volunteering for a possibly suicidal mission. Lando’s proven himself a hundred times over.
Tag: lando calrissian
hi i’m kitty i don’t know anything about star wars whoops
“What am I looking at?”
Lando leaned forward and laced his fingers together. “My taxes.” He paused, then gestured to Han. “Our taxes,” he corrected, with an unnecessarily rakish grin.
Leia squinted at the datapad. “Tax fraud.”
“Oh, no no no. Absolutely not. My accounting is impeccable.”
“I don’t see how it could be,” she said. “He’s a smuggler.”
“Hey,” Han began. He shut his mouth when Leia leveled him with a look. He opened it again to persist, but saw that Lando had a shit-eating grin as he watched their argument-in-potentia. Han glowered at Lando, and made him grin wider. Han huffed, hooking his thumbs on his belt.
“Legally, he’s a long-haul transport navigator,” Lando said, and Leia snorted. “Because he has a spouse at home—me—he qualifies for a higher income deduction as well as a few credits unique to the profession.”
“Wait, credits?” Han asked.
“Because he’s my dependent,” Lando continued, ignoring him.
“The hell I am.”
“That puts me in a unique legal position—not many people know about this, but in order to incentivize long-haul transportation, a spouse who claims a long-haul transport navigator as a dependent qualifies as a household caretaker, which is a kind of head of household that’s able to claim significantly more not only for themselves but for any other dependent spouses they may happen to have.”
“But his transport isn’t legal,” Leia said, fascinated. Han was pretending to understand the conversation, which would have been more convincing if he weren’t already fiddling with a kinetic sculpture on one of Lando’s shelves.
“It’s art.”
“What?”
“As far as my taxes are concerned,” Lando said, “Han transports art. They can’t prove that it isn’t. And I’m always careful to get the valuation right.”
“How do you know what I transport?” Han asked, indignant. A piece came off the sculpture in his hands. He looked down at it, then looked at Lando. He made a hasty attempt to reattach the piece. The entire sculpture collapsed. Han took his hands from it, and attempted to lean casually against the shelves with his elbow to block it from view.
“They call me,” Lando said.
“No,” Leia gasped, delighted.
“Yes,” Lando said, grinning again. “They know I’m his partner. They know I can’t be sure I’m getting my fair share unless I know exactly what he’s getting. So they call me.”
“What!” Han stood straighter, his brow furrowed and his face all twisted into an incredulous pout of anger.
“They might have been able to catch him smuggling,” Lando said to Leia, still not addressing Han.
“They would never,” Han sneered.
“But they’re never going to get him on tax evasion. There’s no way he would have been paying taxes on his own.”
“It never even occurred to me that he would,” Leia said.
“I’m right here,” Han reminded them.
“So you can see why I can’t divorce him,” Lando said.
“I don’t follow,” Leia said.
“My household caretaker status is the foundation of all of this,” he said, pointing to the datapad. “I divorce Han and the whole thing collapses.”
“Collapses how?” Leia asked, narrowing her eyes.
“Cloud City goes bankrupt.”
Han choked.
“How many people have you married?” Leia demanded.
“Leia, you know that you’re my favorite wife-in-law,” Lando said, “but I don’t think I’m comfortable discussing that aspect of my personal life.”
The pile of former-sculpture slid from the shelf, and clattered to the floor.
Han pretended not to notice.
This is GLORIOUS and also 100% in character for someone who allegedly doesn’t know anything about star wars.
Prompt: What was Lando up to during Last Jedi?
His damn job, that’s what.
It’s all very well for Leia to be running the ship and for Luke to be doing…whatever the hell he’s doing, Leia messaged him something about an island and a kid and how they’d gotten the Falcon back, oh and Han was dead, like that was going to stick, Lando’s personally attended no less than five of Han’s funerals and he stopped crying after the third. But someone’s got to make sure the ship’s still running, that the Resistance still has allies and resources and funds, those morons have been under the impression for the last three dozen years that rebellions can be run with a wink and a smile and an inspiring speech.
So Lando manages to escape the disaster at Coruscant and works from the Naboo satellite offices and when Leia’s distress signal comes in, he just rubs his eyes and gets back to work, because the last time she sent him one of those it was because she and Luke had been arguing about whether or not she should get Jedi training and Han had taken his side and Chewie hers and they needed a tiebreaker. He’s not willing to find out what she thinks is an emergency right now, not when he’s got to flip the junk bonds in order to boost the Resistance capital before the whole market crashes.
Fucking Skywalkers.
Lando Calrissian is the Responsible Adult of the Resistance, who knows when to call a plumber, understands mortgages and has insurance that actually pays out when shit happens; he invested in space!Bitcoin in 2011 and now he’s sitting on an untraceable FORTUNE that could pay for like, seven Dreadnoughts and an entire Resistance army earning way above minimum wage
Bless this post.
100% certain han and lando once got married for a scam and forgot to have it annulled so they were technically married for several years and one day lando comes in and goes “real quick: are we solo-calrissian or calrissian-solo? also, i want a divorce” and han is like baby no where did i go wrong we can still fix this
Steel Phoenix Studios 