vampireapologist:

vampireapologist:

vampireapologist:

i was never seen again.

this was the best time ever bc my host had just changed the tire and I was like “oh hell yeah an old tractor tire! you know what that means!” and everyone was like “no….” the French boys and the Norwegians were like “we dont actually” and I was like my god….I’m the only hillbilly here….it’s Up To Me

and I like to think of that as the only significant cultural impact I made.

everyone’s so worried about my tree trajectory but that’s the best part about rolling downhill in tractor tires: so much of the shock is absorbed by the tire so you can pretty much do anything. in theory. i’m not a doctor I actually don’t know you could probably still die. one of the guys I roped into this went over a huge boulder and went airborn for a hot second though so that was fun

the-inverted-langblr:

the-polyglot-aspirations:

no-passaran:

pomowhoro:

sebadass:

isthismadness:

iraincorporated:

laserkittenlucy:

laserkittenlucy:

I think my favorite experience with an American was when I said “I’m from Finland” and she said “Oh so do you speak Scandinavian?” and I swear to god nothing will ever surpass that moment

Actually I fucking lied I’m pretty sure to peak was when my mother was telling a cashier in a target that we couldn’t wait two weeks because we were on vacation and we lived in The Netherlands and she said “The Netherlands? you mean that peter pan place?” 

thank you @worldofwhales for this lovely addition 

OH MIO DIO

i went to summer school in england when i was like 14 and there were some american people and when i said i was italian they started speaking spanish, and when i was like “hey i don’t know spanish can u pls speak english” they were like “but…. you’re from italy… do you not speak spanish in europe?” “No, we speak italian in italy” “oh, that’s a language?”

one time I frustrated this girl so much at one point by not speaking English around her to avoid conversations with her because she was a terrible person and she said “GO BACK TO FRANCE” after snapping one day, entirely convinced Italy was in France

Asdfaddahsd this reminds me of a girl in my geography class when i was in the USA who believed Paris was the capital city of Italy. She also couldn’t be convinced that Poland is a real country because she said it was made up for a movie.

I’m ashamed of my people.. 🙄

My boyfriend told me a story about when he went to Norway and while he was queing for something this American came in and started snapping his fingers yelling “GARCON! GARCON!” (Yes garcon not garçon like he wasn’t even saying it right AND was in the wrong country AND was being incredibly rude)

I’m from New Zealand. I’ve had Americans say to me:

  • “Where in Canada is that?”
  • “You speak such good English!”
  • *blank look*
  • “Is that the place where weed is legal?” (mixing up with the Netherlands I assume)

And my favourite:

  • “Is that up near Boston?”

jenroses:

properrussian:

thegayestpolyglot:

kingdeino:

useless-polandfacts:

useless-czechrepfacts:

wednesdaythunder:

geritashipper:

you-tit:

mikaisyuu:

natsui:

zhanaform:

somalang:

lingumaniac:

polyglottica:

perilegs:

tobdog:

sprachtraeume:

languageoclock:

af-hverju:

littlenerdygirlwithwings:

af-hverju:

me: why are you destroying earth!!!

aliens: because theres people who think that english is the only language they need to speak

me: thats fair i understand

For some reason I find this all the more amusing because it’s written in English

moi: pourquoi vous détruisez le monde!!!
l’extraterrestre: parce que il y a des gens qui pensent que l’anglais est le seule langue pour parler
moi: ah ça c’est bien

ich: warum zerstört ihr die erde!!!

aliens: weil es leute gibt die glauben dass englisch die einzige sprache ist die sie sprechen müssen

ich: das ist fair ich verstehe

ég: af hverju eyðileggið þið jörðina!!!
aliens: af því að það er fólk sem finnst að enska sé sú eina tungumál sem þau þurfa að tala
ég: oh, það er vit í þessu. ég skil.

ik: waarom vernietig je de aarde!!!

aliens: omdat er mensen zijn die denken dat engels de enige taal is die ze hoeven te spreken

ik: oh zo, ik snap het

minä: miks te tuhootte maapalloo?

alienit: koska tääl on ihmisiä joitten mielestä englanti on ainoo kieli jota niitten täytyy puhua

minä: toi on reilua, ymmärrän

私: どうして地球を滅ぼしているんですか?

宇宙人: 英語しか喋る必要がないと思う人がいるからです

私: なるほど、わかりました

me: Wosück maakt ji de Welt twei!!!

aliens: wieldat dat Lüüd gifft, de dinkt dat Engelsch de allenige Spraak weer, de een snacken mütt

me: jo, daar seggst wat. Nu versta ik’t

aniga: dhulka maxaad u burburinaya !!!

shisheeyaha: dadka intiisa badani u malaynayaan in Ingiriisidu tahay afka oo kaliya ay u baahan yihiin inay la hadlaan

aniga: waxaan fahamsanahay. waa wax cadaalad

我:你们为什么在毁灭地球?!!

外星人:因为有人以为他们只会英语就可以了

我:懂了,说得有道理

ako: bakit niyo sinisira ang mundo!!!

taga-ibang planeta: kasi merong mga taong akala nila Ingles lang ang kailangan nilang matutunang lenggwahe

ako: ah, sige naiintindihan ko

Aku : kenapa kau hancurkan bumi!!!
Alien : karena masih banyak orang berpikir hanya bahasa inggris satu-satunya bahasa yang terpenting
Aku : oh, oke lah..

tôi: tại sao các người hủy diệt trái đất!!!

người ngoài hành tinh: bởi vì có người nghĩ rằng tiếng Anh là thứ tiếng duy nhất mà họ cần biết

tôi: ồ thế thì tôi hiểu

Eu: Por que vocês estão destruindo a Terra?!
Aliens: Porque há pessoas que pensam que o inglês é a única língua que eles precisam falar.
Eu: Isso é justo, eu entendo.

jag: varför förintar ni jorden!!!

utomjordingar: för det finns folk som tror att engelska är det ända språket de behöver kunna

jag: rimligt, jag förstår

Já: Proč ničíte Zemi?

Mimozemšťani: Protože tu jsou lidé, kteří si myslí, že angličtina je jediný jazyk, který potřebují znát

Já: To je fér, to chápu.

ja: dlaczego niszczycie Ziemię?

kosmici: ponieważ są ludzie, którzy myślą, że angielski to jedyny język, którego potrzebuję

ja: rozumiem, w porządku

io: perchè state distruggendo la terra!!!

alieni: perchè ci sono delle persone che credono che l’inglese sia l’unica lingua di cui hanno bisogno

io: capisco, mi sembra giusto

Yo: porqué estás destruyendo la tierra!?!?

Extraterrestre: porque hay personas quienes creen que inglés es la única lengua que se tiene que hablar.

Yo: te entiendo, es justo.

Я: Почему вы уничтожаете Землю?!?!
Инопланетяне: Потому что есть люди, которые считают, что им нужно говорить только по-английски.
Я: А, ну понятно, тогда ладно!

A modern Rosetta stone.