I’ve heard the theory that Kirk’s logs just get circulated round headquarters for lulz before being dumped in the circular file as obvious fabrications by someone bored with a frontier posting.
“Hey, have you seen this one? He says he fought Apollo.”
“What, the old earth probe?”
“Try the old earth GOD!”
“Hilarious! Classic Kirk! That’s better than the time when he was transported to an evil dimenison.”
The reason why in The Naked Now it was Riker who remembered that the previous polywater infection had happened is that he’s the sort of person who would read The Hilarious Adventures of Captain Kirk for fun.
I especially like this idea because of the implication that all the other captains in Starfleet are reporting perfectly ordinary experiences like visiting a space station, dropping off supplies at a colony, bit of a stand-off with some Klingons in disputed space but got out of it unscathed – and then there’s Kirk all, “sorry guys we’ve been off course this week because my first officer seriously needed to get laid (LIKE YOU HAVE NO IDEA MY NECK STILL HURTS)” and “let me tell you about the Chicago Gangster planet” and “WHIPPED AND THROWN IN JAIL BY SPACE NAZIS.”
I actually really like the above explanation
“So wait, they stole his first officer’s brain?”
I always preferred the idea that every single Constitution-class starship of the Kirk era was running into all kinds of insane shit and so the Enterprise’s adventures mostly just got lost in the shuffle.
“Sir, Starbase 12 reports a flock of space sharks cruising through the system. They’re worried about them chewing on the antennae.”
“Can we get the Hood over there to monitor their path and shoo them off if need be?”
“No can do sir, Hood called in two days ago, says the Captain took his security detail down to the local surface to fight an army of evil komodo dragons.”
“Damn. What about the Valiant?”
“Captain says she’s currently engaged in a duel of wits with a clone of Bismarck.”
“Like the battleship?”
“No sir, a clone of Otto von Bismarck, the German chancellor from the 1900s.”
“I’m scared to ask, but where’s the Potemkin?”
“Last reported in pursuit of a super-intelligent shade of blue.”
“God’s sake. What about the Enterprise, are they available?”
Seriously, why did they take this scene from the final cut? It is so very important! And not only to explain why Steve lacked the cowl in the end of the movie, but because this tiny moment is extremely important to Steve’s development as a character. He came to be seen as a fascist, as exactly that which he fought to destroy. Captain America, who sought to fight bullies his whole life, is now seen as one. Imagine the impact that had on his head. The meaning of his actions after he saw this. Steve began to give up the Captain America identity right here. This is why in Civil War he has no problems giving up the shield. He and Captain America have long been drifting apart. In fact, they were never one to begin with:
Steve went through his whole life trying to show people he wasn’t what they thought of him. Becoming Captain America was one way to do it, and giving this identity up is another one.
Steve isn’t unaware of the symbolism Captain America entails. For good and for bad. In The First Avenger he uses the symbol in his favour, transforming it. In The Winter Soldier he owns the symbol he became, working in favour of the greater good through his public image. However, in Civil War he has to give the symbol up, for it has come to represent something he is not.
When Tony tells him he doesn’t deserve the shield, Steve is tired of having to “prove” that his actions are those of Captain America. People put Captain America in a box that doesn’t fit Steve Rogers. Tony tells him he is not worthy of being Captain America, of carrying the shield his father made, as if he had betrayed what Howard Stark worked for, as if somehow Howard was responsible for the making of Captain America, and Steve became unworthy to be part of Howard’s legacy. This is just one way people created a general idea about who Captain America is, forgetting the man behind the shield.
Steve will be that which he has to be. That which he feels in his heart and head to be his duty, the right thing. He became Captain America for that reason, and for that same reason he threw cowl and shield aside.
Women have more power and agency in Shakespeare’s comedies than in his tragedies, and usually there are more of them with more speaking time, so I’m pretty sure what Shakespeare’s saying is “men ruin everything” because everyone fucking dies when men are in charge but when women are in charge you get married and live happily ever after
I think you’re reading too far into things, kiddo. Take a break from your women’s studies major and get some fresh air.
Right. Well, I’m a historian, so allow me to elaborate.
One of the most important aspects of the Puritan/Protestant revolution (in the 1590’s in particular) was the foregrounding of marriage as the most appropriate way of life. It often comes as a surprise when people learn this, but Puritans took an absolutely positive view of sexuality within the context of marriage. Clergy were encouraged to lead by example and marry and have children, as opposed to Catholic clergy who prized virginity above all else.Through his comedies, Shakespeare was promoting this new way of life which had never been promoted before. The dogma, thanks to the church, had always been “durr hburr women are evil sex is bad celibacy is your ticket to salvation.” All that changed in Shakespeare’s time, and thanks to him we get a view of the world where marriage, women, and sexuality are in fact the key to salvation.
The difference between the structure of a comedy and a tragedy is that the former is cyclical, and the latter a downward curve. Comedies weren’t stupid fun about the lighter side of life. The definition of a comedy was not a funny play. They were plays that began in turmoil and ended in reconciliation and renewal. They showed the audience the path to salvation, with the comic ending of a happy marriage leaving the promise of societal regeneration intact. Meanwhile, in the tragedies, there is no such promise of regeneration or salvation. The characters destroy themselves. The world in which they live is not sustainable. It leads to a dead end, with no promise of new life.
And so, in comedies, the women are the movers and shakers. They get things done. They move the machinery of the plot along. In tragedies, though women have an important part to play, they are often morally bankrupt as compared to the women of comedies, or if they are morally sound, they are disenfranchised and ignored, and refused the chance to contribute to the society in which they live. Let’s look at some examples.
In Romeo and Juliet, the play ends in tragedy because no-one listens to Juliet. Her father and Paris both insist they know what’s right for her, and they refuse to listen to her pleas for clemency. Juliet begs them – screams, cries, manipulates, tells them outright I cannot marry, just wait a week before you make me marry Paris, just a week, please and they ignore her, and force her into increasingly desperate straits, until at last the two young lovers kill themselves. The message? This violent, hate-filled patriarchal world is unsustainable. The promise of regeneration is cut down with the deaths of these children. Compare to Othello. This is the most horrifying and intimate tragedy of all, with the climax taking place in a bedroom as a husband smothers his young wife. The tragedy here could easily have been averted if Othello had listened to Desdemona and Emilia instead of Iago. The message? This society, built on racism and misogyny and martial, masculine honour, is unsustainable, and cannot regenerate itself. The very horror of it lies in the murder of two wives.
How about Hamlet? Ophelia is a disempowered character, but if Hamlet had listened to her, and not mistreated her, and if her father hadn’t controlled every aspect of her life, then perhaps she wouldn’t have committed suicide. The final scene of carnage is prompted by Laertes and Hamlet furiously grappling over her corpse. When Ophelia dies, any chance of reconciliation dies with her. The world collapses in on itself. This society is unsustainable. King Lear – we all know that this is prompted by Cordelia’s silence, her unwillingness to bend the knee and flatter in the face of tyranny. It is Lear’s disproportionate response to this that sets off the tragedy, and we get a play that is about entropy, aging and the destruction of the social order.
There are exceptions to the rule. I’m sure a lot of you are crying out “but Lady Macbeth!” and it’s a good point. However, in terms of raw power, neither Lady Macbeth nor the witches are as powerful as they appear. The only power they possess is the ability to influence Macbeth; but ultimately it is Macbeth’s own ambition that prompts him to murder Duncan, and it is he who escalates the situation while Lady Macbeth suffers a breakdown. In this case you have women who are allowed to influence the play, but do so for the worse; they fail to be the good moral compasses needed. Goneril, Regan and Gertrude are similarly comparable; they possess a measure of power, but do not use it for good, and again society cannot renew itself.
Now we come to the comedies, where women do have the most control over the plot. The most powerful example is Rosalind in As You Like It. She pulls the strings in every avenue of the plot, and it is thanks to her control that reconciliation is achieved at the end, and all end up happily married. Much Ado About Nothing pivots around a woman’s anger over the abuse of her innocent cousin. If the men were left in charge in this play, no-one would be married at the end, and it would certainly end in tragedy. But Beatrice stands up and rails against men for their cruel conduct towards women and says that famous, spine-tingling line – oh God, that I were a man! I would eat his heart in the marketplace. And Benedick, her suitor, listens to her. He realises that his misogynistic view of the world is wrong and he takes steps to change it. He challenges his male friends for their conduct, parts company with the prince, and by doing this he wins his lady’s hand. The entire happy ending is dependent on the men realising that they must trust, love and respect women. Now it is a society that it worthy of being perpetuated. Regeneration and salvation lies in equality between the sexes and the love husbands and wives cherish for each other. The Merry Wives of Windsor – here we have men learning to trust and respect their wives, Flastaff learning his lesson for trying to seduce married women, and a daughter tricking everyone so she can marry the man she truly loves. A Midsummer Night’s Dream? The turmoil begins because three men are trying to force Hermia to marry someone she does not love, and Helena has been cruelly mistreated. At the end, happiness and harmony comes when the women are allowed to marry the men of their choosing, and it is these marriages that are blessed by the fairies.
What of the romances? In The Tempest, Prospero holds the power, but it is Miranda who is the key to salvation and a happy ending. Without his daughter, it is likely Prospero would have turned into a murderous revenger. The Winter’s Tale sees Leontes destroy himself through his own jealousy. The king becomes a vicious tyrant because he is cruel to his own wife and children, and this breach of faith in suspecting his wife of adultery almost brings ruin to his entire kingdom. Only by obeying the sensible Emilia does Leontes have a chance of achieving redemption, and the pure trust and love that exists between Perdita and Florizel redeems the mistakes of the old generation and leads to a happy ending. Cymbeline? Imogen is wronged, and it is through her love and forgiveness that redemption is achieved at the end. In all of these plays, without the influence of the women there is no happy ending.
The message is clear. Without a woman’s consent and co-operation in living together and bringing up a family, there is turmoil. Equality between the sexes and trust between husbands and wives alone will bring happiness and harmony, not only to the family unit, but to society as a whole. The Taming of the Shrew rears its ugly head as a counter-example, for here a happy ending is dependent on a woman’s absolute subservience and obedience even in the face of abuse. But this is one of Shakespeare’s early plays (and a rip-off of an older comedy called The Taming of a Shrew) and it is interesting to look at how the reception of this play changed as values evolved in this society.
As early as 1611 The Shrew was adapted by the writer John Fletcher in a play called The Woman’s Prize, or The Tamer Tamed. It is both a sequel and an imitation, and it chronicles Petruchio’s search for a second wife after his disastrous marriage with Katherine (whose taming had been temporary) ended with her death. In Fletcher’s version, the men are outfoxed by the women and Petruchio is ‘tamed’ by his new wife. It ends with a rather uplifting epilogue that claims the play aimed:
To teach both sexes due equality
And as they stand bound, to love mutually.
The Taming of the Shrew and The Tamer Tamed were staged back to back in 1633, and it was recorded that although Shakespeare’s Shrew was “liked”, Fletcher’s Tamer Tamed was “very well liked.” You heard it here folks; as early as 1633 audiences found Shakespeare’s message of total female submission uncomfortable, and they preferred John Fletcher’s interpretation and his message of equality between the sexes.
So yes. The message we can take away from Shakespeare is that a world in which women are powerless and cannot or do not contribute positively to society and family is unsustainable. Men, given the power and left to their own devices, will destroy themselves. But if men and women can work together and live in harmony, then the whole community has a chance at salvation, renewal and happiness.
Reaaallly interesting. I think The Merchant Of Venice has an interesting place in thia point. It always feels like a comedy barely saved from turning into a tragedy. And who saves it? Why Portia, of course, with her magnificent speech that starts,
“The quality of mercy is not strain’d,
It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven
Upon the place beneath: it is twice blest;
It blesseth him that gives and him that takes”
Basically the men are all getting themselves in a bloody muddle before she comes along to tell them to stop being silly billies.
The Avengers cost money to run and while Tony’s insanely wealthy, he didn’t get to be a billionaire in addition to the genius/playboy/philanthropist by being foolish when it came to money-making opportunities.
Thus, the comic books.
It’s a great idea, he knows it is. With the return of Captain America, there was a resurgence of all kinds of vintage Cap memorabilia and, among them, are the comics that featured Steve and the Commandos in daring (and, by today’s standards, incredibly racist, sexist, and everything else-ist) adventures. Tony’s got still a few – Dad had the whole run – and he thinks an update will go over well. The Avengers’ PR staff wholeheartedly agree, possibly not because Tony is paying their salaries.
The New Adventures of Captain America is first off the press, packaged with a reprint of the original Captain America #1, and they have to go to a second printing within a month. Steve himself is perfectly happy to sign copies because at least it’s not the beefcake shots that Vanity Fair dug up and ran in the January issue.
The Black Widow comes out next and it gets mixed reviews because the girl-power message got undermined somewhat by the cheesecake art. Tony doesn’t think Natasha’s the kind of pissed that will get him murdered in his sleep, but he can’t promise the safety of the next guy who catcalls out that her boobs aren’t as big in real life.
Invincible Iron Man is the third and, okay, maybe the title’s a bit much, but c’mon, since when has humbleness been part of his toolkit? It’s a detective story with lasers, which is precisely what he asked for. That, and to make him look as tall as Cap if they were ever in the same panel.
Thor has plenty of suggestions for his book’s story arcs, which is why the writer is credited as “scripted by.”
Bruce won’t give permission for anything to do with the Hulk, despite Tony’s assurance that this is a way to ‘demonster’ the Other Guy. Bruce says the Other Guy is a monster and should stay that way. Tony tries a few more times, but Bruce won’t budge. Which is why Tony’s sidekick in his own book is a genius named Bruce, no last name given.
Clint will let them do a Hawkeye book, but the creative team is left to their own devices because he won’t even return their texts or emails. What results is possibly payback because it’s not even a superhero story. It’s an ironic hipster drama where the putative hero is really a shlemiel who is a complete failure at everything but being a superhero. Hawkeye is a runaway success, however, and wins an Eisner. Clint won’t go to the awards ceremony.
When Tony finally sees Barton’s home – and gets over the shock that it is a farm with cows and chickens and a wife and children – he notices that there is not only a framed and autographed copy of Hawkeye #1 under glass in the family room, but there is a commissioned full-color drawing by the series artist. Clint might not want anything to do with it, but Laura Barton is very sure this is the most hysterical thing in the history of ever and trawls eBay for merchandise. It’s been a shitball of a day, of a week, but the mischievous smile Laura gives him when he promises he can hook her up at the source makes it a tiny bit less awful.
FAKE BOOK COVERS FOR BOOKS REFERENCED IN TIN SOLDIERS:
1. Miller, John. Birth of an Icon: Captain America and the Restoration of the Hero. New York: Routledge, 2001. Print. 2. Anderson, Lynn E. Captain America: Behind the Mask. New York: Palgrave Macmillan, 2012. Print. 3. Mbatha, Michelle. The Anatomy of a Sidekick. Bucky Barnes and the Propaganda Machine. New York: Routledge, 2011. Print. 4. Everett, Lloyd. The Star-Spangled Man: Captain America in Comic Books, War Photography and Propaganda. Malden, MA: Blackwell Publishing, 2009. Print. 5. Singh, Kajal. Taking up the S.H.I.E.L.D. Peggy Carter and the Post-War Era. Malden, MA: Blackwell Publishing, 2010. Print. 6. Reid, Maya. The Popular Life of Captain America. Steve Rogers in Popular Culture and Fandom Practice. New York: Palgrave Macmillan, 2013. Print.
I actually hadn’t thought that far ahead lol. When I wrote it on a whim, I planned for things to play out more or less how they had in canon, so the only divergence was that Anakin was born much earlier and found and trained by the only Jedi (reluctantly) willing to do so.
Since having written it, there are already some divergences (Anakin has both hands, but has lost most of his left leg, he fights with a two ended lightstaff rather than a ‘saber). Off the cuff, I would say that Ahsoka would be unaffected by the changes, and still get assigned to Anakin during the Clone Wars.
Partially because Obi-Wan still hyper-corrects himself into the ‘perfect Jedi’ while being a small ball of extreme attachment and rage. Which encourages the Council to try ‘tying Anakin down’ to the Order by throwing more padawans his way. Ahsoka gets one hell of a culture-shock when she thinks she’s going into a slightly maverick but proper Master-Padawan relationship, and instead gets a jealous, hot-headed master and his overly friendly, mercurial Knight.
Thankfully, as attachment-happy as Obi-Wan is, he’s not the jealous sort. This is not Anakin dumping him on the wayside without any warning for some random kid. Obi-Wan is a knight already, and if they’ve forgone tradition and there is still a tight bond between them – well, none of the Council need to know. Anakin still often puts his hand on Obi-Wan’s shoulder and delights in making his ‘perfect Jedi’ mask crack with humor. Anakin still complains of the Council’s decisions and says, “The last thing I need is another reckless little monster to worry about.”
“The thing about little monsters,” Obi-Wan reminds him wryly, “is they are often born with claws and teeth.”
And so is Ahsoka. She’s shocked by the lack of Jedi decorum her master has, but she adjusts for it. Obi-Wan senses a kindred spirit in her, and once Obi-Wan manages to relax his guard enough around her to crack a smile, they end up forming an incredibly tight sibling-padawan bond. It takes time for Ahsoka to stop arguing on Obi-Wan’s side against Anakin’s decisions because OMG THE CODE and join in on the conspiracy ‘What the Council doesn’t know Won’t Hurt Them.’ She’s much more a Jedi in Anakin’s own spirit – she lacks Obi-Wan’s dupliciousness – but she’s resourceful and knows how to ask Obi-Wan to help her get around the Council’s decisions. Anakin has sheer gall and power going for him, and a hardheaded sense of what is right – but her brother-knight seems to know the right way to speak to their master to convince himself to wait for the right time to do the right thing.
One thing Ahsoka realizes: when Obi-Wan is unhappy, everyone is unhappy. You truely don’t realize how much peace-keeping Obi-Wan does until he’s no longer interested in having peace.
I would like to copy down that last paragraph and put it on a wall if I could and only because it is a bit too wordy to tattoo on my skin.
I think I actually need more fic in general revolving around ‘Obi-Wan let’s the people around him go at each other by virtue of stopping mediating and watches the ensuing flame war / cold war while sipping tea.’
a harry potter au where potions is taught by gordon ramsay
neville: *messes up his potion*
gordon ramsay: *holds neville between two slices of bread* what are you
neville: an idiot sandwich
no no no!
Imagine that this is Gordon Ramsay a la Masterchef Junior
Neville: *messes up the potion, realizes it, starts crying quietly*
GR: What’s going on?
Neville: *explains how he messed up*
GR: Oh gosh okay…we can fix this, don’t cry, see, it’s fine now? Just be more careful when you’re adding the Newt’s eyes, all right? Drop them in gently. There we go. No more tears.
Neville: *giggles wetly, wiping eyes*
Yes, he only screams when he’s dealing with people that claim to know what they’re doing and clearly dont, when he’s teaching he’s very kind and patient because they’re still learning.
He’d probably do the bread thing to Malfoy.
nononononono. I get that Malfoy is a bit of a twat, but he’s still a kid. It’d be the teachers fucking up that he’d have trouble with.
Ramsay: All you had to do was treat it with a fucking Beozar!
Slughorn: It was a stressfu-
Ramsay: How long have you been teaching potions?!
or
Ramsay: So you’re going to raise this boy SPECIFICALLY so he can die as part of your twisted little scheme?
Dumbledore: It’s for the greater good, professor.
Ramsay: The greater fucking good?! *holds two slices of bread either side of dumbledoor’s face* What are you?
My favorite Gordon Ramsey moment is from the latest season of Master Chef Jr.
Gordon had run in to help a group of struggling kids with a team challenge and one of the older kids, a 12 year old boy, wasn’t passing attention while taking a pan out of the oven and not only spilled all the food but scalded Gordon.
It’s clear Gordon’s leg is in pain. He’s been badly burned without warning. But he doesn’t scream. He doesn’t yell, not even in pain, and he doesn’t go off on the child who is now frozen in fear. He calmly tells the child to set the pan down and to close the oven, safety first. Then tells him to go restart the food he was making, calm instructions.
My husband and I grew up in abusive homes where any mistake meant parents getting angry (my husband is terrified of spills or broken glasses because that meant beatings growing up, for me, anything going wrong, that could upset my mother, even if it wasn’t my fault meant screaming and emotional abuse).
I didn’t know someone could be so calm. That someone could not get angry, and put aside what they’re feeling (in this case a lot of physical pain) and not take it out on those around them, even when someone around them had messed up, because that person is a child.
Gordon Ramsey is a survivor of child abuse himself and as an adult, the most non-abusive person ever when it comes to kids.
im going to cry can gordon ramsey be my parent this sound so beautiful
This is not “I’m too fucking macho to tell you”, it’s “I can’t handle identity right now or maybe ever”.
IIRC, Furiosa naming him “Fool” is the only time in the whole show that one character teases another. It’s not completely devoid of jokes – Toast makes a sex joke about a pistol, Dag tells her baby to stay put, it’s lost it’s novelty out here. We see affection and care between different characters, especially the five, but we don’t see any teasing in the forms of status games – no physical play, or insults, or reminders of past embarrassments, except this one.
And this is an incredibly high stakes moment. Why does Furiosa do it? She’s insulting Max when he’s already really damn on edge, and she’s about to give him control of the rig and make him responsible for their escape plan. At first glance it looks like a really stupid idea to take a poke at a guy who’s currently holding a gun on you.
The obvious reason is that teasing (when it’s not bullying) is an indicator of a close social bond. You only tease people you’re comfortable with. She’s giving Max an insulting nickname because when you act as though you’re comfortable, it helps you become comfortable. She’s trying hard to deescalate the situation and win him over, and this is one tool for doing so.
I think there’s a more subtle reason too, and it’s that Furiosa sees right through him. She already knows that Max was human once, and is afraid to be human again. Teasing isn’t unique to the human species, but it’s one of our higher order functions and it’s very, very relational. Furiosa isn’t just trying to fake a bond with Max that doesn’t exist yet, she’s trying to remind him of his humanity. He’s just denied his humanity and avoid relationship by refusing to give his name. She’s going to drag him back into humanity by the scruff of his neck if he has to, and by calling him a fool she’s pointing out that she sees his attempts to avoid attachment and that it’s, well, foolish. Not helpful for survival, either physically or emotionally, and she needs him, dammit.
The obvious Doylist explanation of the scene is that names are important in this show (such good meta about that today!), and naming Max ‘Fool’ is symbolic on a number of different levels. It’s one of a million pieces of heart-rending meaning that Miller and co. packed into this thing. But I think that explanation works on a Watsonian level as well. Furiosa doesn’t have time to think all of this through rationally, but she intuitively knows how to draw Max into the group and she does it with consummate skill. By calling him names.
okay but things i’ve been thinking about that the internet has not been able to supply me an answer for: is it ever clarified where jedi get their robes? because i’ve read every relevant wikia and wikipedia and wookeepedia page and so on and NOTHING.
it’s only ever said that jedi “get” robes. that their robes are fitted sometimes to their climates or styles. but i don’t think they can just walk up into the star-wal-mart on naboo to pick up some jedi robes. (and yes, while other people wore styles LIKE jedi robes in the original trilogy, it was the prequels and so on that established that the robes ben kenobi was wearing and so on were fashioned in traditional jedi style and that was what was usual for them, as jedi would walk somewhere and people would KNOW they were jedi)
so where? was it a specific jedi’s job to make the robes? like that was his or her or their trade? or more likely, did each jedi have to make their own robes? as a friend suggested, with the monastic style of the jedi, you can imagine them saying you need to make their own clothes. therefore, sewing was a required jedi skill.
and now all i can think about is obi wan kenobi leaning over a sewing machine peacefully hemming his robes on a friday night with a cup of tea.
(and as justin put in my head, anakin frustrated to the ends of the earth because “WHY DO I NEED TO HEM IT IF IT’S JUST GOING TO GET DESTROYED AGAIN”)
Given the diplomatic duties and general “running around the galaxy, getting shot at” nature of the Jedi, I imagine there is a supply office, run by a quartermaster, where Jedi get fitted for robes. You grow out of them? Returned and reused by someone else. I like to imagine that styles and colours change over the years, but because the robes are always being recycled, this is why you get so many different “looks” to different Jedi (along with different styles and cuts depending on species, genders, and occupation).
They also have the standard two sizes: too big and too small, which explains Obi-Wan’s cloak in TPM.
I also like the idea that obi-wan actually fits the “too small” robe, but is either a) wearing a spare of qui-gons because his keep getting shredded or lost (the habit started early, okay) and the quartermaster won’t give him a new one until he proves he can care for it, or he pick it as a teenager in a desperate HOPE that he would grow into it. (Spoilers–he never does but he hangs onto it for Anakin)
But I’m over here still thinking about supply depots and stuff and it’s probably the job of someone (some group more like) in the Service Corp to help keep track of this and they’re doing paperwork and there’s a betting pool now in that section of the Corps about how long it will be before Kenobi puts in for ANOTHER fucking robe. And if that trait is going to rub off on his Padawan.
*nods*
I always figured it was the job of a subdivision of the Service Corp too. @jhaernyl actually had the brilliant idea of there being a Jedi Administrative Corps (the AdminCorps for short) that deals with all of the internal day-to-day bureaucratic issues: paperwork, budgeting, investing the Order’s funds, legal matters, ordering and organizing the production and distribution of food and cloth goods, hiring and training Temple workers, and so forth, and I’ve since more or less incorporated that into my headcanon.
And since the Jedi are very much into the communal thing, it makes perfect sense to me that outgrown robes would be passed around and reused. For some reason, I’ve always had it in my head that Jedi get their robes from the quartermaster/robe master/whomever, but that once they have them, they’re responsible for doing the bulk of their own mending and any special tailoring that they so desire (and possibly cleaning them too, but I tend to think that’s just an in-the-field type of thing).
Also: you can pry the headcanon of betting pools about when Obi-Wan is going to lose his next robe (and how many total robes he’s going to lose in a calendar year) from my cold dead hands. Personally, I think several Council members are secretly in on it… especially once Obi-Wan becomes part of the Council himself. I could have sworn I wrote a short little not-fic on this exact topic, in fact, but now I can’t seem to find it; bet it’s hiding somewhere deeeeep in my drafts folder lol.
I also headcanoned that the Corps and the Knights would have different buildings they lived on, while the Jedi Temple we see in the movie was more of an administrative / representative seat (and as to why they live and train padawans there, think of it as only the best of the best being housed and trained there, because that’s who you want any potential Senate visitor to see), commonly (and erroneously) known as the Jedi Districts and the Corps District (actually, they are the Knights Compound and the Jedi Compound, as all members of the Corps are Jedi they just are not Knights, but those names are long lost from vernacular language and are relegated to historical tomes that even in portable shape feel like you are lugging around something the size of a crate).
I’m bringing this up because in my idea of the Order (which has expanded to include Excel documents with formulas to calculate the size of an actual Galaxy-worth Order, with exceedingly low numbers that are still more reasonable than the canon ones) the Jedi were given air rights to the space above the original compounds as part of the Ruusaan Reformation deal (I play in Legends as a playground, let this be your warning) and so as Coruscant kept shooting up and up in the sky, so did their buildings.
And in the Jedi Compound / Corps District, that means you have hundreds of levels were all the kids who are not chosen to be padawans and are sent to the Agricorps are not only housed but also trained. How would you train them?
Why, by having artificial recreations of alien environments from planets where the Agricorps are a presence / were a presence with imported local fauna and flora, so that they can work up from the really easy worlds and chores to being able to deal with terraforming hostile places and bringing agriculture back even in desperate conditions.
(I have rules and stuff about how apprentiships in the Corps work and how 90% you start out Agricorps and then a lot of people join other branches and how they have their own name for apprentices that are not padawans and how they learn in group and — okay I will shut up and get back to the point).
That’s relevant to the discourse at hand because one of the side effects of this, is that the Jedi Compound / Corps District produces huge amounts of vegetables, meat and goods that are later prepared and distributed to the Knights Compound / Jedi District, the Temple and the various assistance centers that are disposed one every hundred levels or so on the lenght of the Jedi Compound / Corps District.
(Think of these centers as sort of a cross between a free medical center, a neutral ground, a shelter and a detox facility, as these are all services they offer; they basically are places where if you are in trouble or hurt or just you don’t have where to go for the night, you can check into [no questions asked] and get treated for whatever ails you and then drop your clothes, shower, get some warm food in you and sleep and then the next morning or, honestly, whenever you are able to leave under your own will, you can get your clothes back or choose between all the stores of clothes they have there, some of them donated and some of them left behind and a lot of them, not in any Jedi style but in contemporary or semi-contemporary very basic styles, provided by the AgriCorps).
So that’s where I headcanon the cloth and make of the Jedi clothes happens (I also headcanon each Corp as having their own style of robes that is relatively distinct and should help identify them or letting them identify each other) insofar as the Jedi on Coruscant are concerned. I also agree to the fact that each Jedi personalizes his or hers or hirs appearance as better suits them, but again they can request those materials from the AgriCorps and then either do the modification themselves (and thus learn to sew or carve or whatever) or ask someone in the Corps who has dedicated hirs, hers or his life to making clothes, because that is where the path that makes them happy lies, and thus they enjoy a challenge.
I was talking to someone about Fury Road today and they said ‘I just hated how it had no plot. They just left and then turned around and went straight back, it was so stupid’ and I think my soul was in danger of leaving my body because really – that’s the whole point. That’s the great message of Mad Max Fury Road – they need to leave and go back because they need to understand that the Green Place doesn’t exist. Valhalla doesn’t exist. There’s no better place waiting, no Eden to escape to, nowhere for Furiosa and the wives to run to. This world, broken and damaged and war-torn as it is, is all they have, and if they want a Green Place then they have to make it themselves. They have to choose peace. They have to choose love for each other. They have to take the seeds from the older, violent generation and start again. They have to destroy the oppressive power structures holding them back, capitalism and the patriarchy that Immortan Joe represents.
The Green Place was around them all along, and it takes this long, cyclical journey to understand that, both for them and for the audience. The circular narrative structure is an absolute work of genius, and the fact that the entire plot can be boiled down to “they leave and come back” is an indication of how well this works as an action movie – that the plot is simple enough so everyone can understand what’s going on while explosions are going off and cars are racing past at 100mph – yet it’s still incredibly rich and wonderfully complex too.
And what a pertinent message to send out – the generations before us killed the world and now it’s up to us to fix what’s broken. There’s no Green Place but the one we make ourselves, which will be born out of fire and blood and rise from the ashes of the old world.
Steel Phoenix Studios 