Headcanon: Jane Foster Saves The Universe

rcmclachlan:

Ever since I saw Thor: Ragnarok (which I loved SO MUCH), all I’ve been able to think about is that one throwaway line that explained away Jane Foster’s absence. It really steams my clams that we had this awesome scientist who was as awkward and earnest as any of us dorks, who humanized a bratty space prince and never compromised herself or her work, and they erased her with a single line about her dumping Thor—like it explained anything. Like, she tore apart the stars looking for him for three years, and suddenly she’s like “Peace out, girl scout”? I can’t see her giving up him and their life together—which they fought for—for anything.

After a lot of angry mumbling to myself and singing along to sad 90s ballads in my car, I realized exactly what must have happened.

  • Odin happened.

  • The All-Father himself shows up on Jane’s doorstep at like 6 in the morning on a random Tuesday, wearing a ratty bathrobe and in serious need of a bath and beard trim. She suddenly feels better about the fact that she’s not wearing a bra under her shirt.

  • It’s actually Thor’s shirt.

  • “They evacuated the nursing home and I slept under a bridge before I recalled that you resided in the next town over” is a sentence she never expected to come out of the mouth of a veritable god, and yet here they are. Instead of asking the many questions she has (most of them starting with “what” and “the fuck”), she hustles him inside and gets him seated on the couch with a mug of the really good coffee (sent weekly by Tony Stark, because “minds like ours need high test, pangolin, you’ll see what I’m talking about”).

  • “At least you Midgardians can do one thing right,” Odin rumbles and drains his coffee in a single go, because like father like son, and the son is a champion mead drinker on several worlds. It physically pains Jane to give Odin any more of it, because it comes by the ounce and not by the can, and it’s going to be another six days before her next coffee delivery arrives.

  • Odin asks if they can watch The Price Is Right. The nursing home had him follow a pretty strict routine and he hates deviating from it.

  • Seriously, what.

  • While Drew Carey explains the rules of Lucky Seven to contestant Linda, who has the chance to win a new truck if she’s left holding a dollar by the end of the game, Jane finally can’t hold it in anymore and blurts out that Thor isn’t there. “He’s gone this week. Hunting for more Infinity Stones. You know. Since the thing with Malekith, we’ve been searching for more. But he should be back by Friday.”

  • Odin nods sagely and says that Linda should choose 4 as her next guess.

  • This is the man who once compared her to a goat. Now he’s yelling at the TV because Linda picked 9.

Keep reading

twistedingenue:

glynnisi:

samanthastar47:

iputabirdonmyhead:

Surrounding Natalie Portman and Thor Ragnarok, here’s some facts, information, and research, so people can stop saying Natalie chose not to come back:

Kevin Feige first announced Natalie wouldn’t return in May 2016, stating on the Empire Film podcast there were “many reasons, many of which are in the film, so you will see that.” Of course we now know that in fact is an exaggeration, as Jane Foster’s character is explained away in two sentences about how she dumped him, to which Thor says it was a “mutual dumping.” 

Now, let’s go straight from the source. Natalie Portman said in August 2016 (in an interview that’s been very incorrectly headlined in the media to make it seem like Natalie is choosing to be done): “As far as I know, I’m done,” she told the newspaper. “I mean, I don’t know if maybe one day they’ll ask for an Avengers 7 or whatever, I have no idea. But as far as I know, I’m done, but it was a great thing to be a part of.”

Again speaking to Deadline about big movies like Thor and Star Wars in December 2016: “It is really an incredible thing to get to be part of. As an actor it is like a completely different scale. Because when you are making those movies you are working with so much blue screen and so much fantasy, your imagination has to be so much larger. It is really challenging for me that and I don’t feel like I have gotten it yet. I don’t feel like I have understood it yet. It is something that I’m fascinated by, because I’m really challenged by it more than anything almost. Because when you are in a room that looks like a room and has all the things a room has in it, you can interact with all that stuff, and all that stuff does what it does in life. You don’t have to imagine anything. You are just in the emotional state of your character. When you are doing those blue screen movies, you have to imagine everything outside and within. You have to create the whole world. It is like being a kid again.” When asked if that means she’s up for another Thor: “Yeah well hopefully one day I figure it out! [laughs].”

Kevin Feige apparently felt the lead female character needed to be “Thor’s equal” which is funny because I’m pretty sure considering Jane weak contradicts the point of the first Thor: “We wanted Thor to encounter somebody that was near his equal and that his relationship with Jane may have evolved in unexpected ways in between The Dark World and Ragnarok and we wanted to pit him against a character who was much more his equal and in many ways his superior.”

Director Taika Waititi later stated: “[With Valkyrie] I wanted to make sure we weren’t making a female character that was boring and pretty. What I wanted was someone who was going to play the opposite and be even more of the ‘guy’ character than the guys.

And of course, all of this started because there were rumors that Natalie Portman was reluctant to return for the Dark World once Marvel fired the director she wanted to make the film (Patty Jenkins, who went on to make the #1 superhero origin film of all time). Natalie Portman addressed this in a Marie Clare interview in 2013: The sequel was developed amid reports that Portman was reluctant to make a second go of it. “No,” she says flatly. “Chris is, like, one of the greatest people in Hollywood. He’s the kind of actor who’s so charismatic, he must be tired when he goes home.” You could also presume if Natalie was unhappy with Marvel, she got over it like any professional adult would, considering this would’ve happened before the Dark World filmed, a movie which ended with Thor giving up the chance to be King of Asgard to go and be with Jane. Reshoots were filmed to add the after credits make out session, all of which could’ve been changed if Portman was so difficult to work with. And let’s not forget the Age of Ultron reference which painted Jane in equal relation to Thor as Pepper to Tony, leaving audiences with the presumption they were together, though Jane wasn’t currently in New York. Speaking of which, during the Dark World press tour, when asked if she’d been asked for Avengers 2 yet, she stated: “No, no. Tell them. Tell the Marvel guys.” When asked if she would be game? “Sure, I love these movies.” 

I’ll end by adding that I would agree with the common consensus that Thor: The Dark World wasn’t as good as its predecessor, but I think that blame has been unfairly placed on Natalie Portman. I saw Thor: Ragnarok and enjoyed myself, but I don’t think Thor and Jane needed to be broken up, so that a relationship built over two movies (which had really just begun by the end of the Dark World) went nowhere. You could’ve had Jane sit this one out, and bring her back later for more closure. Portman is contracted for a third film, stating during Comic-Con in 2010 when asked (13:15 mark) that she is not in the Avengers, but will be in future Thor films when/if they are made. If only. 

@iamartemisday

@gv-dreaming-awake

@poetattemptsfiction

STOP SMEARING NATALIE PORTMAN.  Long live Dr. Jane Foster!

Marvel doesn’t understand how to write “normal” women. Full stop.

They can write a meaningful storyline for a tree though.

pyrebomb:

Day 1 without Mjolnir: Thor throws a remote at his brother.

Day 2 without Mjolnir: Thor throws his brother at some guards.

2 weeks without Mjolnir: Thor throws increasingly improbable items about desperately hoping to find one that returns to him. Utter destruction lies in his wake.